GIF Of Thrones Recap: ‘Dark Wings, Dark Words’

Nearly every line from “Dark Wings, Dark Words” could be emblazoned on a quote-of-the-day calender or poster that will appear in TV show dorm room for decades; it was that clever of an episode. In terms of forwarding the plot, not much happens — Bran & Co. meet the Reeds, Jamie and Brienne fight, Jon and Samwell walk around beyond the Wall, etc. — but that’s mainly because we’re not sure where the story is taking us yet (though a convergence at Riverrun seems likely).

The writing was so superb, so witty, so devilish (thank George R.R. Martin, obviously, but also Vanessa Taylor), though, that you’re completely entranced by the journey, by Joffrey’s sexual perversity, by Arya’s big bark, smaller bite. Game of Thrones isn’t a show about the big moments; it’s about the small details that lead to events like Blackwater, and a lot of engaging background was filled in with “Dark Wings.” Also, Hodor.

No dragon CGI porn this week, but we do get a three-eyed crow, last seen in the Game of Thrones promo that told us nothing. It should have, though — why not just SAY that Bran’s going to dream about his two brothers and hear his dad father’s voice whisper through the trees and meet a stranger who’s very important? But I GUESS HBO’s decision to not spoil everything in a dumb advertisement works, too. (Via)

Rickon, as useful as ever. (Via)

More like Hunkrey, amirite, ladies? Cersei’s learning the hard way that if you treat your spoiled rotten sh*t of a son like he’s the greatest thing since super measles wiped out thousands of King’s Landing commoners, he’s going to act like a spoiled rotten sh*t of a son. (Via)

Which would you pay more money to see: a Queen of Thorns vs. Violet Crawley old lady sass-off… (Via)

…or a buddy comedy about Jaime proving to Brienne that you should NEVER let your guide be your conscience? It’s close, but I’m going with a third option I just made up: Not-Lady Brienne and the Kingslayer…meeting Michonne and her two zombies on the road, and they fight to the death. Or second death, as it were. (Via)

Sansa’s the REAL Stark bitch. (Via)

You’ve never seen the BBC Office, Jon Snow? (Via)

And off to Riverrun Robb and his less-than-merry band of followers go, to pay their respects to Cat’s soon-to-be deceased father. The Robb/Cat stuff has been disjointed in both episodes so far; last week, it was confusing, and in “Dark Wings,” although Cat’s monologue was fantastic, it was also unnecessary. It’s as if the writers just needed to give Michelle Fairley something to do. I don’t think this is too much of a spoiler, but by book three, Cat barely thought about Jon, let alone gave a long speech to her son’s wife about him. Then again, considering all the terrible decisions made by the Starks, maybe it makes sense that these scenes were aimless. (Via)

Me too, Joffrey. I hate myself for how much I liked this scene, and not just because it’s extremely well written and acted. Margaery is much more interesting of a character on the show than in the books, thanks to the way Natalie Dormer plays her as someone who seems genuinely naive, yet also wickedly cunning. The way she distracts Joffrey from his threats is a thing of beauty, as is the way she squeezes her…I think it’s time for the Attractive Women of Game of Thrones Power Rankings: 1. Margaery, 2. Shae, 3. Ygriette, 4. Talisa, 5. Oleanna (oh yeah). (Via)

Or “what we love,” like me and that last paragraph. Also, sisters. (Via)

Not much Tyrion this episode — my guess is he wouldn’t have even been in it, were Peter Drunklage not the show’s “lead” — but the bit we did see, in which Shae interrogates the disgraced former Hand about Sansa, feels like a small fragment of a greater whole. Some mighty fine backtracking, too. (Via)

Actually, put that quote on a motivational coffee mug. The Reeds are fan favorites, and not just among the large overlap of Game of Thrones and Love Actually devotees. Their arrival is essential to Bran figuring out what the hell he is because, really, what the hell is a warg and why is he one? Also, when did Bran turn 23 years old? (Via)

Yeah, seems about right for Theon’s story. NEXT. (Via)

About 15 minutes into the episode, I found myself asking, to paraphrase Milhouse, “When are they going to get to the Arya stuff???” Thank god they did, or otherwise there would have been a revolt. From me. Arya’s trudging through the forest with Hot Pie and Gendry when they run into the Brotherhood without Banners, the group the Tickler was trying to glean information about last season at Harrenhal. They appear to be a relatively decent group of guys — meaning, HUGE Garden State fans — and everything’s coming up Arya, until… (Via)

Oh boy. I’ve heard hell #4 is nice this time of year. (Via)

If Arya and Brienne ever meet up, they’ll single handedly destroy misogyny. Jaime can’t be content that he wasn’t able to take down Brienne, a girl, nor should either of them be off their guards, now that they’ve been taken hostage by the Boltons. I hope the show checks in on the traveler who ratted out J & B. My only major criticism of the season so far is that there hasn’t been enough plots. WHAT WILL HE DO WITH ALL THAT SILVER? (Via)

You said it, Happy Hodor. (Via)