Kendra Is Going to Win ‘Dancing With the Stars’

Below is the first clip of Kendra Wilkinson rehearsing for “Dancing with the Stars,” and I won’t oversell it: it’s SPECTACULAR. I’m not some huge fan of Kendra — she seems barely literate, and every time she opens her mouth I expect her to burp — but there’s no denying that years of screwing for money has turned her hips into something magical. There’s a stretch in this video from :33 to :37 that make me VERY interested in Kendra’s cha-cha. Mmmm, that’s good double entendre.

A note to the fat white middle-aged housewives who always mess up the “DWTS” voting: I swear to God, if you jealous shrikes vote off Kendra for being hot like you do all the other hot chicks, I will murder your tubby dim-witted children. Or if I don’t murder them, then I’ll just vote against any medical bill that gives diabetes care to young people. So what’s it gonna be: a couple more weeks of Kendra dancing, or little Madison’s feet?