Once upon a time, Liz Lemon made a meta reference to The Office’s Michael Scott, when she said “Steve Carell owns ‘That’s what she said‘” on 30 Rock. And she was 100% right. He gave that joke to your co-worker, who jumps at the opportunity to blurt it out every day in an attempt to get a laugh in the break room. For that reason, I’ve gathered a bunch of other hilariously earnest things that Michael Scott said throughout the run of The Office…
“Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy. Both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.”
“You may look around and see two groups here: white collar, blue collar. But I don’t see it that way, and you know why not? Because I am collar-blind.”
“If I had a gun, with two bullets, and I was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden and Toby, I would shoot Toby twice.”
“You don’t call retarded people retards. It’s bad taste. You call your friends retards when they’re acting retarded.”
“Hate to see you leave, but love to watch you go, ’cause of your butt.”
“Sometimes I’ll start a sentence and I don’t even know where it’s going. I just hope I find it along the way.”
“There’s no such thing as an appropriate joke, that’s why it’s a joke.”
“You don’t know me, you’ve just seen my penis.”
“I DECLARE BANKRUPTCY!”
“That’s what she said.”
