One Of D.J.’s Kids On ‘Fuller House’ Is A Bicycle-Riding Mini-Stamos Named J.D.

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If you ever find yourself sitting outside on a nice day, looking up at the clouds, thinking, “Hey, I wonder if that new Full House show, Fuller House, will feature a bicycle-riding, music-playing, 12-year-old ladies’ man named Jesse who goes by J.D. and is basically a miniature carbon-copy of the character John Stamos played on the original”?

Me neither.

But thanks to a new scoop from TV Line about D.J. and Kimmy’s kids on the show, we have our answer anyway, and that answer is yuuuuuuuuup.

Jesse Daniel (aka “J.D.”) is D.J.’s 12/13-year-old son, described as a “ladies’ man” with three girlfriends. He worshipped his dad and is having a difficult time coping with the loss, which results in him acting out. D.J. tries to make him a better person — he allegedly resents her for “constantly pushing him to read, do charity work and generally de-shallow” — but it doesn’t sound like her plan is working. (Bonus scoop: J.D. is a musician and rides bikes, just like his [Great] Uncle Jesse.)

REMINDER: That thing about “coping with the loss?” That’s because D.J.’s husband just died, leaving her to raise her kids by herself, just like her dad had to when her mother died at a young age. D.J. Tanner’s life is TRAGIC.

But the Full House similarities don’t end there: D.J.’s other kid is a 6-year-old Danny clone named Max, who “takes tremendous pride in keeping his room tidy, his shirt tucked in, and has already mastered the art of hospital corners.” And she’s apparently pregnant when the show starts, too, so you can probably expect the baby to somehow end up with Coulier-like traits even though “Uncle” Joey wasn’t a blood relation and genetics don’t really work that way, because sure. If we’re doing this — if we’re really, really doing it — we might as well go all the way.

Oh, and Kimmy Gibbler’s kid is a bi-racial 12-year-old named Ramona who embraces her Latina heritage and enjoys “boys, fashion, being cool, social media and taking pics every second of every day.” So, now you know that, too. Big day for you.