There are fierce women on television and then there’s Rosa Diaz (Stephanie Beatriz). The stoic, mysterious detective on Brooklyn 99 is in a league of her own when it comes to giving zero f*cks about… well, anything. She doesn’t conform to societal norms, doesn’t ascribe to social rituals, and she damn sure doesn’t care what people think of her. Detective Diaz doesn’t mind punching tubby cops in the gut for wishing her a happy birthday. She’s only told three people she loves them, and she regrets one of those times after finding out her grandfather wasn’t dying. She enjoys planning moments of spiteful vengeance to enact on her deathbed. She is, quite simply, the most badass woman on the planet.
Trying to imitate her cool, unfeeling brashness towards people and her general unimpressed attitude towards life is probably impossible — you’re born with that kind of talent or you’re not — but in case you want to give it a try, here are a few quotes you can learn from.
“I hate small talk. Let’s drink in silence.”
People throughout history have lauded the value of small talk. It’s become a staple in all human interactions and, quite frankly, we’ve developed an embarrassing reliance on it. Not Rosa Diaz. The detective has never been the kind of person who feels obligated to talk nonsense just to make others feel at ease. That’s why, when she was enjoying a beer with Detective Boyle (Joe Lo Truglio) after solving a murder case and dealing with Jake Peralta’s (Andy Samberg) strange sexual adventure with a medical examiner in season one, she refused to respond to his painfully obvious colloquial initiator.
Why commiserate on a lousy work day with a co-worker or chat about the weather with a stranger when you can just enjoy the sweet sound of silence while sipping an ice cold beer and pretending to hate everyone around you? Look, it takes a special kind of confidence to endure long, stilted pauses in conversations without succumbing to the nagging need to fill said silences with inane chatter. Be that special kind of confidence-possessing person.