We’ve seen the commercials and read some of the jokes. We know that no topic or person is safe around professional roast guest Jeffrey Ross, and it’s safe to assume that Hannibal Buress is the leading contender for Most Valuable Roaster. But now it’s time to actually watch the Comedy Central Roast of Justin Bieber, so we can laugh at the sick burns, cringe at the awful pre-written jokes told by celebrities with very little comedy background, and then roll our eyes as the guest of honor, Justin Bieber, pretends like he can roll with the punches and is a bigger man than he was when he was, say, peeing in mop buckets and being carried up the Great Wall of China.
Normally, we don’t host live discussions for Comedy Central’s Roasts, but this is no ordinary event. Because most of us can see through the PR BS, we know that this is all part of Bieber’s manipulative “I’m a big boy now” mea culpa to show business. With that in mind, I’m hosting this live discussion so we can A) try to pinpoint the moments when Bieber takes mental notes to destroy ruthless comics like Buress and anyone else that dares cross him, B) all cough, “Bullsh*t” into our hands as Bieber pretends like he’s cool with Selena Gomez jokes, and C) smile.
Why are we smiling? Because Larry the Cable Guy was roasted once and look at where he is now. Dreams for Bieber’s demise aside, the roast begins at 9:30 PM ET with the Pre-Show on Comedy Central, so join us to judge and rank the professional roasters, while we all try to burn Bieber as well. It’s pretty easy.