‘The Today Show’ Wants Pippa Middleton To Tell Us About British Things, Will Pay Handsomely

It appears as though noted butt-haver and future my-girlfriend-be-er Pippa Middleton may be landing on her feet after her recent foray into literature was unceremoniously unloaded upon by a bunch of doodooheaded critics (publishing term). According to the Mirror, the royal sister-in-law is being offered somewhere in the neighborhood of $600,000 to be The Today Show’s new “royal correspondent.”

A source in the US ­revealed: “NBC senior figures will bill this job to Pippa as a special ­correspondent in 2013. They see her appeal as huge as she is linked to the Royal Family and because of her popularity following the wedding when pictures of her went worldwide.

“A couple of offers are on the table, but they would like her to make as many as 20 appearances reporting on Royal-themed events like the Chelsea Flower Show, the opening of Buckingham Palace and Opera House nights. [Mirror]

Okay, so here is my favorite part of this story: That quote, the one in the first paragraph where the source says “when pictures of her went worldwide” … it’s about her butt. That’s why Pippa Middleton is famous, in case you forgot. Because of her butt. She rocked the chiffon out of a hip-hugging white dress the day her sister married the future King of England, and now she’s being offered like $30,000 a pop to tell Americans about fancy British things once or twice a month while we finish our second cup of coffee. The world is an amazing place. Never forget that.

Photo credit: Featureflash /