The Tywin Lannister Guide To Parenting

Tywin Lannister is blessed with abilities that few men possess. He’s blessed to belong to one of the most powerful families in the kingdoms, and he’s still blessed with his health. What has he done with these blessings? He’s taught us a lot about how to be a dad, and today being Father’s Day, let’s have a look at these most terrifying of Game of Thrones parental lessons. (This is not a space to talk about tonight’s episode, by the way.)

1. Give all your heart-to-heart speeches while gutting an animal…

2. …or over your grandchild’s corpse.

3. The family that drinks together, stays together.

4. Bad mouth your in-laws.

5. Don’t give your children special treatment.

6. Don’t just help your kids — help them in the most dramatic way possible.

7. Teach them to respect the family name.

8. When all else fails, shake dat ass.