FlipBoardIn addition to more pressing issues like the fate of the Russian gecko orgy that is currently floating around aimlessly in the cosmos, John Oliver discussed nuclear weapons on the latest episode of Last Week Tonight. It’s really funny, as his big weekly heaves usually are, but it’s also really terrifying. The way our country handles nuclear weapons is apparently one step above the way an ADD-riddled 7-year-old handles his toys. Don’t believe me? Enjoy this quote, taken from around the 7:00 mark, after we already learned that some of our nuclear facilities received D grades for safety, and that the computer that is supposed to receive launch order from the president still runs on floppy disks.
Take a moment to consider the run of poor decisions that are required before you’re being told you can’t play guitar with a Beatles cover band when you’re drunk at a Mexican restaurant in Russia. Just add all that up together and consider this man had access to our deadliest nuclear weapons.
AND IT GETS WORSE. I DIDN’T EVEN TELL YOU ABOUT THE COUNTERFEIT POKER CHIPS OR FOOD DELIVERY GUYS. WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE.
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There is an argument to be made that the old software run on 5.25″ floppies is a security measure to prevent people hacking the system….but the counterargument of sleeping with the doors open does negate it
You can melvin me now, but I think that is a 8″ floppy, not a 5.25″. And security through obscurity isn’t.
I can see that- the Battlestar Galactica defense. Adama would never let the ship’s computer systems be updated, and when the shit hit the fan, the Cylons couldn’t “infect” their old computers. Yes, I’m a geek.
I’d be lying if that wasn’t part of my thinking Public haha, but I’ve actually seen it before used by politicians/generals to defend it.
It would be a defense if those systems don’t fail constantly and have to be countermanded by a human who might be asleep. The Russian systems are even worse, and why do you think they still have those systems? It’s not because China is threatening them all the time.
We’ve been minutes from almost total nuclear annihilation too many times for it to be considered ok anymore.
Doing a GIS for 8″ floppy returned ZERO penises
:(
Oliver just keep on getting better and better.
His anger is what really sells it and what really sold his stint behind the desk when Jon Stewart was out
Vomiting a half-eaten chimichanga on a Slavic Ringo.
Lost it.
Well fuck.
That town in NC that the bombs were dropped on is my hometown, and I can assure you that not enough people that live there are aware of that fact. When he said what that sign should be changed to, I laughed for about 30 seconds straight
In 2009, President Obama stated America’s commitment to a world without nuclear weapons. Help us remind him that words without action are weapons-grade bullsh*t! If you’re on Twitter use that handle for good this week and join us: [goo.gl]
I’m just glad he gave us all Kremlin address to email Putin.