Smallville (The CW, Friday) – I am giving this top billing for three reasons. 1) It is the series finale. 2) I had no idea it was still on, and neither did you. 3) I wanted to run a picture of Erica Durance as the banner instead of Ed Helms.
Blue Bloods (CBS, Friday) – Season finale. I know a few people who watch this that swear it’s not the usual, run of the mill, crapfest CBS procedural. I still have not watched it, mainly because if I do, and they are wrong, I will cause a tremendous scene demanding that hour of my life back that will ruin the friendships. One of them makes terrific chili dip that she always brings to social gatherings. It’s just not a risk I’m willing to take.
Saturday Night Live (NBC, Saturday) – Ed Helms hosts, with musical guest Paul Simon. I’ve liked Ed Helms in just about everything he’s done, so I’m cautiously optimistic on this one. Don’t hurt me, SNL. I’m quite fragile.
Parking Wars (A&E, Saturday) – Two of the most loathsome subsets of people in the world are meter maids and reality television stars. This show managed to combine them. I’ve made the case a number of times that this is the worst thing to ever happen to my precious Philadelphia.
Survivor (ABC, Sunday) – Season finale. Spoiler alert: A malnourished person wins $1 million.
Desperate Housewives (ABC, Sunday) – Season finale. Spoiler alert: Bleh.
The Killing (AMC, Sunday) – Spoiler alert: It rains a lot while ominous music plays.
Game of Thrones (HBO, Sunday) – Spoiler alert: Someone gets killed, someone gets naked, someone gets killed while naked.