30 Rock (NBC) — Season premiere. I’m not a big Tina Fey fan, but despite her vocal detractors, I don’t particularly dislike her, either. Besides, what’s the point of bitching about Fey when there’s so much comedic brilliance coming from Tracy Morgan and Alec Baldwin?
Project Runway (Lifetime) — Tonight’s task: create a look for guest Christina Aguilera. Man, I love me some Christina Aguilera. Talented chicks who love to show off their terrific bodies always win me over.
It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia (FX) — Dee sets out to wreck a wedding; the gang tries to get Charlie back into the dating scene. I know that this is an obvious and dull observation, but Charlie just kills me. The combination of his voice with the delivery gets me laughing several times an episode.
Fringe (Fox) — Pacey and the team go to Seattle to investigate an evil ram-horned creature. Spoiler alert: the creature is your mom.
Survivor: Samoa (CBS) — If I didn’t have better things to do (gamble & drink), I might actually watch this episode: the contestants are all miserable from being stuck in a torrential downpour. And if you’ve ever camped in the rain, you know that nothing is more delightful than watching people aching to be dry and warm while you sit comfortably on your couch.
In Performance at the White House (PBS) — You may have seen news clips of the Obamas salsa dancing the other day at “Fiesta Latina;” now PBS is airing it as a one-hour special. Watch as white people awkwardly clap along to Latin music.
Mall Cops: Mall of America (TLC) — AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAA! Wooooo. Heh heh. Good one, TLC.