09.16.09 9 years ago 12 Comments

Bear Grylls, you stole my heart.

Man vs. Wild (Discovery) — Dangerous snakes, porcupine hunting, and a visit to tribes that live in hostile environments. That reminds me: did I ever post the clip of Bear Grylls stabbing a reindeer in the head, then slitting its throat AND DRINKING ITS BLOOD before removing its heart and TAKING A BITE OUT OF IT? No? Then check out the video below.

The Beautiful Life (CW) — Series premiere. Remember “Models, Inc.”? This show should do just about as well.

The Ultimate Fighter (Spike) — Season Premiere. Kimbo Slice’s once-promising MMA career went down the crapper when he got knocked out by noted gaywad and “TUF” failure Seth Petruzelli, a loss that essentially sank Elite XC. And now that turd has been retrieved, with Kimbo getting a chance at making the UFC in this heavyweights-only season. Rashad Evans and Rampage Jackson will coach the fighters, so expect to see a young woman groped.

Glee (Fox) — A nice, gay counterweight to all that testosterone I’ll be getting from “The Ultimate Fighter.”

America’s Got Talent (NBC) — Two-hour season finale. Whoa, already? Man, I’ve gotten really GOOD at ignoring this show’s existence.

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