Scandal has rocked the small town of Valrico, Florida, as a man was fired for desecrating a Chili’s restaurant that had otherwise been a home to affordable family dining and delicious El Presidente margaritas. Thanks to the brave efforts of ABC Action News, a man who calls himself Justin Speekz was fired from his job as a cook at that city’s Chili’s after he shared photos of himself shirtless in the kitchen. Speekz would have gotten away with it if it weren’t for the fact that he tagged his restaurant in the images as part of his “Sexy Cooks of Chili’s” campaign.
According to Tampa’s WFTS, the Department of Business and Professional Regulation found no violations being committed in Speekz’s photos because there was no food visible on the prep table that he was blessing with his raw animal sexuality. However, I reached out to the Department of Sweet Nipple Ring, Bro and a spokesperson replied, “Seriously, sweet nipple ring, bro.” Jokez aside, a rep for Chili’s told the news station that Speekz was immediately terminated because the company maintains “very high standards of food quality, safety and cleanliness.”
However, I’m not sure how serious that claim is, because the restaurant has yet to be scorched and scraped from the face of the Earth.