‘White Girl Wasted’ Bike Thief Wins The Internet With Best Apology Ever

Whether you’re six years old or sixty, it sucks to get your bike stolen. We’ve just about all been there at some point. The thief is usually some soulless dick who in no way took the bike with noble intent. And if you ever do manage to re-claim your trusty, two-wheeled method of transportation, it’s usually beat to hell and forever tarnished. Such a bummer.

Well, none of this is the case for the Redditor who just shared three wonderful images with the caption: “3 nights ago my bike was stolen. It just turned up back in my yard this morning with this note… Ain’t even mad.”

Let’s take a look at the return note and attached payback and meet on the other side.

So. Many. Highlights. Where to begin? How about a free Chocolate Lava Crunch Cake? Sure, you have to purchase a pizza to obtain said reward AND the coupon is expired, but you’re going to be ordering the pizza anyway and Domino’s is usually cool with still redeeming those things. Just a nice gesture.

From there we have loads of honesty, academic achievement, fairly good judgment, and a compliment only a true cycling enthusiast can appreciate. Best bike thief ever? Best bike thief ever. It’s official.

Recent university graduate who gets “white girl wasted” on occasion, you win the internet.

(Via Reddit)