Here Are Some Of The Funniest Bodily Sensations The Opposite Sex Will Never Experience


The opposite sex will never fail to mystify. And no, I’m not talking about that Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus horsecrap, I’m speaking as a woman who will never know what it feels like to get a boner. Or how men will never, ever be able to wrap their heads around feminine hygiene products. So, in a similar vein of the recent topic of gross bodily functions, AskReddit has produced the question: “What’s one sensation the opposite sex will truly never get to experience?”

As is usually the case with these things, the answers range from hilarious to downright disgusting, and after having skimmed through it, I think we all learned a little more about each other today. Here are some of the best answers. Feel free to leave your own in the comments:

TragicHeron so eloquently, yet accurately writes:

When you sneeze on your period and it feels like you are giving birth to a jellyfish

I actually physically recoiled at slickguy’s contribution, here:

When your genitals accidentally brush the inside of the toilet when you’re trying to poop.

To be fair, some ladies can do what dick-nipples describes here, only with boobs:

Slap Dancing. That’s when us guys keep our feet planted and twist our upper bodies rapidly to make our dongs swing back and forth, slapping our thighs. It’s a riot!

Trap-Lord makes a case for this, and I have to say it does sound strangely appealing:

When you flush the toilet mid piss and time it perfectly so when your done all the piss is already flushed away

While men go on their happy way, Punkdrummer12 describes the aftermath of sex without a condom for women:

An hour after sex, walking around campus, and then feeling semen fall out of your vagina and squish around in your pants.

I don’t know why seanxprt does this, and I don’t think I want to know:

Hanging a towel on your dick.

This delightful contribution comes from user Mtrayne:

Pulling out a dry tampon and feeling like you’re ripping your insides out

I get what WHOREMOAANS is saying here, but men do still have the option to sit down. It’s really not that bad.

A 1,500% decrease in toilet aim in the morning and/or after sex.

I take that it’s the same for roller coasters, what TakeOffYourMask describes here?

When you go over a small hill in your car and your testicles experience microgravity.

Just a guess that _ShortGirlProblems’_ username might be reflecting this issue:

That feeling during sex when the guy goes a little too deep and hits your cervix. Ouch!

And I’ve saved the best for last, compliments of sunnygcat, here:

When you fart and rolls up into your vagina instead of back and out

Dudes, if you want to learn more than you’ve ever wanted to know about vagina fart bubbles, I can’t encourage you enough to check out that entire thread.