Kellyanne Conway’s Fake ‘Bowling Green Massacre’ Is Inspiring Hilarious Alternative Facts

It’s amazing, really: on Thursday morning, no one, save Kellyanne Conway, had heard of the Bowling Green Massacre; by Thursday night and into Friday, it’s all anyone could talk about. Such is the power of “alternative facts.”

Let’s be clear: there is no such thing as the “Bowling Green Massacre,” no matter what Conway said on Hardball. “I bet it’s brand new information to people that President Obama had a six-month ban on the Iraqi refugee program after two Iraqis came here to this country, were radicalized and they were the masterminds behind the Bowling Green Massacre,” she told Chris Matthews. “Most people don’t know that because it didn’t get covered.”

It also doesn’t exist. Two Iraqi nationals, Waad Ramadan Alwan and Mohanad Shareef Hammadi, were arrested in Bowling Green, Kentucky, in 2011 on terrorism charges (CNN notes, “The two men were never planning on committing an act of terrorism on US soil. Instead, they were trying to help get weapons to al Qaeda in Iraq”) and there’s a video on YouTube titled “Kentucky Chainsaw Massacre.” But these are unrelated events. Now that one of the president’s most trusted advisors is making up facts, though, the internet is doing the same with some hilarious details about the “massacre.”

Oh, and don’t worry: there were Mark Wahlberg jokes.

Mark Wahlberg would have stopped the Bowling Green Massacre.