Sad Craigslist User Begs For ‘Idiot’ To Help Him Beat ‘Super Mario World’

The Vanilla Dome in Super Mario World isn’t a particularly notable set of stages. It shows the usual Nintendo polish and craft when it comes to platformers, but it’s not Soda Lake or anything. Unless, apparently, you are this sad, sad man.

Posted to the Los Angeles Craigslist, it’s an almost beautiful haiku of gamer frustration. Here’s a screenshot so it can preserved forever:

For the screenshot-averse:

Help plz.

I can’t beat the Vanilla Dome in Super Mario World for SNES.

I’ve tried 476 times.

I officialy have “the fear.”

Need a random idiot to come over and do it for me.

The wizards are driving me insane. I’ve almost lost it completely.

Will provide whiskey and donuts.

Plz help me.

If you were wondering what, exactly, is giving this guy so much trouble that he’s willing to part with whiskey and donuts to a total stranger, here’s the answer: He can’t beat the final castle, which to be fair is kind of a bastard.

Or he might be very, very drunk. Both are options. Either way, if you live in the LA area, don’t mind being called an idiot on Craigslist, and want both whiskey and donuts, well, you’ve finally got a use for your Mario skills.