Yesterday, Mexico launched a manhunt after notorious drug lord Joaquin “El Chapo” Guzman escaped a maximum security prison through a mile-long, elaborately constructed tunnel. Barring an arrest, El Chapo will be back in command of the Sinaloa Cartel in a matter of days. Considering how El Chapo’s most recent arrest followed a 13-year manhunt, he’ll likely find a way to evade being taken into custody again.
Luckily, Donald Trump is on the case. Trump used this current event to let the U.S. know he’s the only presidential candidate who can defeat El Chapo. Remember, Trump was the one to wag his finger at Mexico for the terrible plague of drugs and rape spreading across the U.S. border. With El Chapo’s escape, Trump feels vindicated.
Trump believes he can negotiate with a drug lord who is savvy enough to cultivate a marijuana field in U.S. National Forest land in Wisconsin. Trump would simply yell, “You’re fired!” And poof, there goes El Chapo and all his mighty tunnels. Trump ranted on Twitter about his drug lord-defeating prowess:
Trump wasn’t done rambling, though: He let everyone know how he’s suffered “unfair treatment by the media” because no one else had the guts to admit that drugs cross the U.S. border. Trump knows!