Egyptian Statue Mysteriously Spinning, Stargate To Open Shortly

So, uh, this is weird: An Egyptian statue that has been in the same case for eighty years has recently started slowly spinning in a circle. Did we mention it’s a statue of Osiris, which as we all learned from comic books is the lord of the Egyptian underworld? OK, so he also granted all life in the actual mythology, but this story is much better with a “lord of the underworld” hook.

It’s so subtle that you can’t see it with the naked eye. But you can see it with helpful stop motion video recorded by the Manchester Museum!

As you can see, the statue slowly spins throughout the day. Rather creepily, though, the statue hasn’t left that case for eight decades; it was tossed in there when it was first found, and has stayed put until very recently.

Logically, of course, this means that, at best, people are about to start dying mysteriously with their brains removed near the Manchester Museum, and at worst, Manchester is about to be invaded by the Goa’uld. But some scientist of course has to weigh in with some dweeby and obviously wrong theory about friction:

Professor Brian Cox [Ed. Note: No, the physicist, not the actor], who teaches physics at the city’s university, claims the movement is due to the “differential friction”.

You’ve doomed yourself, Cox. Seriously, only mayors of seaside towns attacked by sharks are at more risk of an ironic death.

Joking aside, Cox is likely right; if you watch the video, you’ll notice the statue seems only to spin when people are up and about. That would indicate that there some sort of subtle vibration running through the case, due to a change in foot or road traffic, and moving the statue, which makes it an incredibly neat demonstration of complexity theory and how we affect our environment without even realizing.

But assuming a Goa’uld invasion is more fun, so we’re going with that. Protect ya neck, people.

image courtesy MGM Television