Emo Chris Evans Can’t Stop Thinking About Captain America In A Whipped Cream Bikini

Editorial Director

Scanning over Cajun Boy’s recap of all the geektastic imagery from the first day at Comic-Con I kept coming back to how — as CB pointed out — emo our new Captain America looked in so many of the photos, particularly here and here. Just simply despondent. Considering he recently told the New York Times that he went into therapy after landing the role maybe it shouldn’t be surprising, but really — what could this dude have to be so depressed about? Captain America is pretty good by all accounts (Vince’s review here) and it’s almost guaranteed to make him a household name, and he’s got pretty lady reporters climbing out of his windows in the wee hours of the California morning.
I think the emo-ness can be explained away in a variety of ways. First of all, he was spending the day pandering to nerds at Comic-Con. I can only imagine how soul-crushing that could be if you let it get to you. Or maybe he’s just realized that being a B-lister with zero percent body fat and a hefty bank account isn’t all it’s cracked up to be?
But in the world I want to live in Chris Evans was reflecting on all the crappy movies it took to get here. I mean, the dude sideburnsed his way through arguably the two worst comic book movies ever made and sported a parody whipped cream bikini. Was it worth it? I imagine a walk through that emo Captain America head of his goes something like this…

And now a little emo-ness for the ladies…

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