Reddit is back again, this time not providing us with hilarious anecdotes about what parents have found in their children’s search history, but giving us the craziest things that they as teachers sent kids to the principal’s office for.
Check out all the stories at AskReddit. Here are some highlights, involving looking up what “teabagging” means, getting one’s desk set on fire, swearing (of course), sex toys, and microwaving a whole chicken:
Sometimes these incidents are education for administrators. From MusclesRipley:
We were doing sketch comedy in 6th grade a few years back and seeing as it was a nice day we went outside to practice. From across the field I see one of my students very clearly and aggressively trying to put his junk on a prone classmate. When I asked him, he said it was for his sketch and he was playing a character named “the iron teabag”.
The best was the follow up text from my boss saying “I had to Google what teabagging was before I met with the kid”
This one is terrifying. From Bitsandfights:
My dad worked as a teacher in a school for misguided youth, on the first day, he wrote his name on the board as new teachers do, and when he turned back toward the class, a kid had lit his desk on fire with hair spray and was just laughing. 3 foot high flame no more than a foot away from him.
I didn’t send him to the office but one of my fav moments was one time I was working with a small group while other students worked on independent stuff around the room. One student was working pretty close to me and obviously made a mistake because he exclaims “sh*t!” So I said “excuse me, Ty? What was that?” and he says “oh, I didn’t say what you think I said Ms. Someday42.” And I said “oh good. What DID you say?” And he says “I said shiiiiiii…….(obviously thinking hard)….. t.” And then just stared at me horrified. I was trying so hard not to laugh but I just told him “That’s what I thought you said, please don’t use that language in my classroom.”
How did this happen? From Angry_helper:
I had a kid show up to band with a massive black dildo instead of his clarinet, and he honestly thought I wouldn’t notice.
Kid in boarding tried to cook a whole raw chicken with like 5 minutes in the microwave. A whole chicken.