“The Busey Zone” is the best web series not enough people are watching. On January 21, a video entitled “inner tubes,” in which America’s crazy-eyed mascot explains the “multidimensional” appeal of an inner tube and how you, yes YOU, can turn an ordinary, run of the mill inner tube into a sex toy to “pump, f*ck” while on an “auto shop honeymoon,” was uploaded onto YouTube, and its view count is below 20,000. Let me rephrase: there is a video on YouTube where Gary Busey, the star of Rookie of the Year and other stuff, probably, not only pitches a TV show called American Pumpf*ckers, but shows us, via a cigar, what it looks like when a female pleasures herself on a vibrator attached to an inner tube, and it has fewer views than “Honey Boo Boo — My Special Juice.”
Gary Busey is too good for us. For those who have watched, though, what do you think is in that ominous black case to his left? A guitar or gun is too obvious. I’m thinking a dozen dead snakes lined out like suspenders, or maybe we’re in the case and Busey’s the only one OUT of it. This has been The Busey Zone.