It Didn’t Take Long For Amazon Reviewers To Begin Making General Petraeus Penis Jokes

General Petraeus? More like Gentle-While-In-Her Bed-Lay-Us…I dunno, either; my CIA puns are rusty.

David H. Petraeus, the director of the Central Intelligence Agency and one of America’s most decorated four-star generals, resigned on Friday after an F.B.I. investigation uncovered evidence that he had been involved in an extramarital affair.

Administration and Congressional officials identified the woman as Paula Broadwell, the co-author of a biography of Mr. Petraeus. Her book, All In: The Education of General David Petraeus, was published this year. Ms. Broadwell could not be reached for comment. (Via)

If not for the name of Broadwell’s book, I honestly don’t think the Internet would care about this story — they’d be onto more important things, like BIEBS AND SELENA BROKE UP :( — but c’mon, ALL IN. That’s the most perfect political scandal title since Monica Lewinsky’s regrettable in hindsight pre-Clinton memoir, No Cigar In The Vagina: My Kindergarten Years (yeah, that’s right, Lewinsky jokes are BACK, baby).

Naturally, Amazon reviewers have already taken to commenting on the book’s page.

What a disgrace on every level. The General should have picked a reputable writier instead of a fan to write his story. But then we all know that he was really interested in getting “All IN” her pants. Two West Point grads now fallen disgraces. If Betrayus lies to his wife he will lie to the American people.

Wow!! Great book written by an “embedded” reporter. Appropriate title about the general being “all in”. Great little story about his nickname “peaches”. Also, a plethora of information regarding his “surge”. Nothing like pure, untainted journalism.

Not since the second biography by Kay Summersby came out prior to her death in 1975, has there been a military read that has so engrossed me, nay, cascaded over me like the feel of cool silk sheets on tremulous skin. Reading about Monty’s penchant for ski instructors just doesn’t do anything for me – since I’m straight. Thank you Ms. Broadwell for finally bringing this sorry drought to a seeping end!

The book title is perfect…now that we know the general was “all in” Ms. Broadwell. Kinda casts a questionable light on the objectivity of the author, don’t you think?

Ohhhhh, NOW I get it.

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