So, you’ve got your Black Friday itinerary ready and it’s the week of Thanksgiving. But I have some bad news for you: you’re already too late. If you’re still in your house, you have already lost Black Friday because this gentleman, Jarvis Johnson of Avondale, Arizona, has been camping out in front of Best Buy since Sunday. And he’s not just holed up on a lounge chair in a parka. Jarvis Johnson built himself a freaking house.
Okay, it’s a tent, but like a club that Stefon would promote, this place has everything. It has heat, a bed, cable, nearly wall-to-wall carpeting, a microwave, a cooler… no wifi, but probably Menorah the Explorer, this being the holiday season and all. But this isn’t Johnson’s first rodeo — he’s been camping out early for Black Friday for the past eight years. When asked about his strategy, he had the following to say:
“I’m here early because they say the early bird gets the worm, and the early, early, early bird gets the biggest worm, and I guess I’m the bird and I’m trying to get the worm,” Johnson said. “That’s why I’m here.”
There you have it. An old-fashioned approach that applies perfectly to a fairly recent tradition. But unfortunately, you have already lost, so better luck next year!