Jimmy Kimmel dedicated his entire monologue to the Brett Kavanaugh Senate Judiciary Committee hearing on Thursday night’s show, since it was all anyone was talking about that day. After taking a few moments to praise Dr. Christine Blasey Ford for her bravery and composure on the stand, Kimmel sunk his claws into Kavanaugh for his angry, shouty lack thereof. Or as he joked, “I haven’t seen this much crying and yelling since the Cubs won the world series.”
“Whether or not he’s guilty of sexual assault, what we do know is that Brett Kavanagh is the world’s worst celebrity spokesperson for beer,” Kimmel added, of the Supreme Court nominee’s frequent mentions of his fondness for beer during the testimony. When he was finished roasting Kavanagh however (with a few punches directed at Sen. Lindsey Graham for good measure), Kimmel saved the most of his ire for Donald Trump Jr., of all people, for a tweet directed at Ford during the hearing.
“I’m no psychology professor but it does seem weird to me that someone could have a selective fear of flying,” the president’s son tweeted, of Ford’s fear of flying. “Can’t do it to testify but for vacation, well it’s not a problem at all.”
“I agree, you are not a psychology professor,” Kimmel started off, before delivering a fatality, Mortal Kombat style:
“You are a dull-witted human canker sore who shoots baby hippos out of daddy’s helicopter because it’s the only way you can get an erection,” he said. “Do us a favor, put the Twitter aside and go rub a tub of AXE Extreme Hold hair gel on your empty head, you chinless son of a circus peanut.”
“Could there be a dumber thing to be than Donald Trump Jr.?” he added at the end. Hmm, yeah … no comment.