Scalpers Are Awful People: Louis C.K. Tickets Are For Sale On StubHub For $275

There are plenty of dicks out there.

Earlier this week, Louis C.K. announced that he would going on tour during the fall, and in a f-you move to Ticketmaster, said that all tickets would be sold on his website for $45. Every seat, every row: $45. Maybe it’s because I live in New York City and paying $8 for a beer at a bar doesn’t seem totally unreasonable, but $45 to see one of the greatest stand-up comedians of all-time, at the peak of his prowess, is an amazing deal. And, to the surprise of no one, tickets have been selling briskly.

Yes, since tickets went on-sale they’ve flown off the Internet’s proverbial shelves: in only 45 hours, C.K. sold 100,000 tickets, to the tune of $4.5 million. Not too shabby. It was a win for fans, who didn’t have to deal with Ticketmaster, and a win for Louis, because even if this wasn’t his intention, it proved he’s the most beloved comedian in the world right now. All C.K. asked of buyers is that they didn’t resell their tickets on Craigslist or StubHub for above face value because “my goal here is that people…are able to pay a fair price.”

But he forgot one thing: people are terrible.

Although Craigslist has remained free of over-face scalped and/or trying-to-be-resold tickets for his New York City Center shows, the same can’t be said of StubHub. It’s not quite to the level of, say, a Phish show (only 1,708 tickets left for their upcoming July 4th gig on Long Island!), but well:

To these “fans” or scalpers or whomever who are doing the ONE thing C.K. asked them not to do, whether or not the tickets are real or fakes, I only have one thing to say to you: