In case you haven’t heard, Martha Stewart, our patron saint of all things home and garden, recently debuted a new set of tote bags in her exclusive QVC line. And if you haven’t heard, you’re probably wondering why this is news, because our lady Martha sells all kinds of junk on QVC.
A fair point, for sure!
However, have we mentioned that these tote bags are very, very large? And just how large are they?
Starting at 12am to 1am ET tomorrow on @QVC, I'll be talking about my Multi-Purpose Heavy Duty Tote TSV! I'll also be on throughout the day with some of my other great gardening items – planters, gloves, shovels and more! Tune in to shop! pic.twitter.com/k4pIFtbErE
— Martha Stewart (@MarthaStewart) August 28, 2018
According to the product description on QVC’s website:
From garden cleanups to toting toys and beach towels, these Martha Stewart XL totes can handle all your heavy-duty tasks. Taking their place among your most trusted yard work companions, these multipurpose bags feature a polypropylene construction that carries up to 47 gallons or 930 lbs!
You read that right: nine hundred and fifty pounds. That is like, a lot of pounds! And sure, garden supplies and beach accessories — but what could the average person possibly put in a tote bag made to carry nearly a half ton?
https://twitter.com/lindseyweber/status/1034842767984406529
Ah, okay, we see you, Martha.
Because of this reason and others, lot of people came up with creative jokes about the enormous bags.
https://twitter.com/brycejclancy/status/1035225363750768640
Did Martha invent the ikea bag? https://t.co/Ycsr4bwmpm
— Carson (@CarsonSieving) August 30, 2018
when i first saw this photo i thought martha had thrown all her cats in one big bag pic.twitter.com/7l2012Gz6d
— joe erbentraut (@robojojo) August 30, 2018
https://twitter.com/j_manos20/status/1035222409723437056
honestly, new laptop bag.
— julia (@whateverr_r) August 29, 2018
Martha coming for the big boy tote crown! @jjjjound the ball is in your court! pic.twitter.com/EdBpKQ3LLR
— Chris Black (@donetodeath) August 28, 2018
And then there are those who have legitimately just fallen under the spell of the giant tote bags:
I simply MUST have this extra large tote https://t.co/hMDOgha6Aj pic.twitter.com/IRKkbGq8u9
— Steph Davidson (@stephcd) August 29, 2018
I might have just purchased @MarthaStewart body bags (they can fit 930 pounds) on @QVC. You can drag it across all kinds of terrain fully loaded and it won’t tear pic.twitter.com/pKFNsnw90q
— The Princess of Whales (@GeraldFarinas) August 29, 2018
https://twitter.com/weshanderson/status/1035227751580614656
If anyone is so inclined, it’s worth mentioning that the bags are currently on sale for $43.56 for a set of three — you know, just in case you have more than one body to dispose of.