Martha Stewart Is Selling Absurdly Large Tote Bags To The Delight Of The Internet

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In case you haven’t heard, Martha Stewart, our patron saint of all things home and garden, recently debuted a new set of tote bags in her exclusive QVC line. And if you haven’t heard, you’re probably wondering why this is news, because our lady Martha sells all kinds of junk on QVC.

A fair point, for sure!

However, have we mentioned that these tote bags are very, very large? And just how large are they?

According to the product description on QVC’s website:

From garden cleanups to toting toys and beach towels, these Martha Stewart XL totes can handle all your heavy-duty tasks. Taking their place among your most trusted yard work companions, these multipurpose bags feature a polypropylene construction that carries up to 47 gallons or 930 lbs!

You read that right: nine hundred and fifty pounds. That is like, a lot of pounds! And sure, garden supplies and beach accessories — but what could the average person possibly put in a tote bag made to carry nearly a half ton?

Ah, okay, we see you, Martha.

Because of this reason and others, lot of people came up with creative jokes about the enormous bags.

And then there are those who have legitimately just fallen under the spell of the giant tote bags:

If anyone is so inclined, it’s worth mentioning that the bags are currently on sale for $43.56 for a set of three — you know, just in case you have more than one body to dispose of.