My favorite thing about this video, in which a guy hauls a nine-foot-long alligator out of a Florida swimming pool with a rope, is how ambivalently the guy hauls a nine-foot-long alligator out of a Florida swimming pool with a rope — like it’s the most normal goddamn thing in the world! Nothing to see here, folks, just a gator in the pool again. And then, I don’t know if it’s the guy who pulled the alligator out of the pool or one of the other bystanders, someone asks the woman whose home it is ostensibly if she’s “got a leash or anything.”
A leash! Like it’s an uncooperative golden retriever going to the vet, and not a giant-ass reptile with nearly 4,000 pounds of bite force. Yeah, guys, you go right ahead and put the leash on the alligator. Don’t forget the poop bags while you’re at it.