This summer’s 2016 Rio Olympics may be plagued with problems such as filth and pestilence, budgetary limitations, corruption, and serious security concerns, but one thing that won’t be an issue is unprotected sex, according to new reports. In addition to air conditioning (ooh la la!), each bedroom in the 31 17-story apartment towers built to house Olympic athletes and coaches will be outfitted with complimentary condoms. A lot of condoms.
The International Olympic Committee is providing a record 140,000 condoms to 11,000 athletes, which boils down to 42 condoms per athlete — not counting 6,000 coaches and various security personnel, volunteers and members of the media who may also be taking advantage of the housing. That’s three times as much as the highest previous total!
But why so many condoms?
“Part of the reason” for the increase, per the Associated Press, “was because 100,000 female condoms will be available for the first time, along with 350,000 condoms for men. About 175,000 packets of lubricant are also being supplied.”
Suffice to say, this is good news for athletes who are concerned about the Zika virus, which can be sexually transmitted. And as we know, there’s nothing Olympic athletes — the most perfect human specimens mankind has to offer — like more than no-strings-attached casual sex. Maybe the Rio Olympics won’t be a complete disaster after all!