Report: Hitler's Chronic Farting Had More To Do With Vegetarianism Than His Love For Bull Semen And Cocaine

Editor-in-Chief
05.03.12

I really think this may be the best lede in the history of journalism and I envy the person wrote it…

Nazi madman Adolf Hitler craved cocaine and cars, farted uncontrollably due to his vegetarian diet and was injected with semen from young bulls to keep up with his curvy gal pal Eva Braun, according to a rarely seen and historic cache documents, X-rays and maps of the fuehrer’s “Wolfs Lair” set for public auction next week.

Taking this news into consideration and applying the Law of Whoever Smelt It, Dealt It, I think we know the answer to the question posed by Meme Hitler above. Now let’s just sit back and wait for the inevitable video showing Hitler’s reaction to the news that Hitler was a chronic farter with a penchant for cocaine and bull semen. You know it’s coming.

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