Sally Draper Is Growing Up Fast

Here’s an almost word for word transcription of an internal monologue that took place in my head a few minutes ago…

“What this? A Funny or Die video starring Kiernan Shipka, aka Sally Draper from Mad Men, titled “Child Star Psychologist.” Well of course I’ll watch that! Let me click play.

Wow, Kiernan Shipka looks…good. I mean, she’s cute. Damn she’s really cute. But like, in a totally innocent way. But damn she looks like she OH GOD WHAT AM I SAYING — SHE’S A LITTLE GIRL!!!

But God it seems like she’s in the midst of the transition from little girl to teenage girl since the last season of the show went off the air until now, in this video I’m watching. Man, she’s going to be really hot really soon. I wonder if little pervy Glenn is gonna get to hit that on the show?

STOP IT! STOP IT! STOP IT! The FBI and Chris Hanson are probably monitoring my thoughts right now and are about to come busting through the door. What’s wrong with me?! God I hate myself.”

Yeah, that’s pretty much exactly how it happened. Sally Draper is going to be a grown-ass woman before we all know it. Damn that makes me feel old.

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