Someone Stole $70,000 Worth Of Bull Semen From A Minnesota Farm

Miura Fighting Bulls At Zahariche Land
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Yesterday we found out that British thieves pulled off a daring $300 million jewel heist over the Easter weekend, complete with rappelling and reinforced-door-penetrating and other movie-worthy details. Now, with those thieves still on the loose, we find out that the Easter crime spree was international.

From the Austin Daily Herald in Minnesota:

According to Mower County Sheriff Terese Amazi, a LeRoy man reported on Tuesday that a storage canister with vials of bull semen was taken from his unlocked barn/milking parlor somewhere between April 1 through 7. He said the only time he and his hired hand were away from the farm was from 11 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. on Easter Sunday.

The Herald goes on to say that the individual vials inside the the storage cannister are worth between $300 and $1,500 each, bringing the total value of the heist to somewhere in the neighborhood of $70,000. A $70,000 EASTER SUNDAY BULL SEMEN HEIST.

I hate to do this, but I wouldn’t be doing my job if I didn’t ask.

Was it you?

Did you steal the bull semen?

Did you steal $70,000 worth of bull semen on Easter Sunday?

Be honest.

Tell you what, I’m going to turn around for 10 seconds and if somebody — and it could be anyone: you, someone else, you — puts the bull semen back in the Minnesota farm, we’ll all agree to look the other way, okay?

Put the bull semen back.