#StickerBoy Is The One True Frontrunner Of The Iowa Caucus

A clear frontrunner has emerged from Monday’s Iowa Caucus, and that frontrunner is #StickerBoy. What, you didn’t think we were talking about Ted “teen tit film” Cruz or Hillary “coin toss” Clinton? No, the real focus of our attention — besides F-bomb dropping ladies on MSNBC — was on Drake University student Peter Clinkscales, who showed up to watch Hillary Clinton deliver her not-quite-victory speech at his school despite being an undecided voter himself. He then proceeded to… well, you can see the video above. Or in this little GIF which sums it up perfectly:

That. He did that. Bless him.

As much as some might tsk at a young man not taking this ritual seriously, as an Iowan who can finally turn his phone ringer back on today, all I have to say is: good. F*ck it all. Anyway, we can’t hate on anyone who fills out their Twitter bio with a Ron Swanson quote: “I’m a simple man. I like pretty, dark-haired women and breakfast food.”

He also fit some interesting facial expressions and a dab into his repertoire:


The performance earned him some new fans on Twitter:


Clinkscales is enjoying his newfound audience, but he doesn’t stand a chance of selling those stickers for as much as a Drake University education costs.