Hold Me I’m Scared: The Best 80s Horror Movie VHS Covers

Oh, horror movie VHS covers — was there kid alive during the 80s that didn’t creep away from their parents’ side while at the video store to sneak a peek at the contents of the horror section? The boxes were gory, creepy, goofy, covered with half naked butts and boobs and just sitting right out on the shelf for all to see! They offered a brief voyeuristic glimpse of the kind of adult entertainment that was usually hidden from our young eyes.

Of course almost all these movies were terrible letdowns once we actually got to watch them, but it didn’t matter — their covers were still permanently burned into a generation’s grey matter. So, as Halloween approaches, let’s skip the crappy 80s horror movies, and just appreciate their wonderfully absurd cover art. Hit the jump for the 25 best horror VHS covers of the 1980s…

Thanks to Critical Condition for reminding me of a lot of these.

25) Slumber Party Massacre

A pile of boobs and guy a with phallic drill — this one made a man out of me.

24) Halloween II

Guys…it’s a pumpkin and a skull all in one. It doesn’t get any Halloweenier.

23) Mardi Gras Massacre

…or maybe it was this one that ushered in my manhood.

22) Silent Night, Deadly Night

I…what are you doing Santa? Did…did some kid ask for an axe?

21) Slugs

This cover achieves the nigh-impossible task of making slugs seem somewhat threatning.

20) I Spit on your Grave

So yeah, this is kind of a ugly movie about rape and whatnot, but all I knew as a kid was that it had a big, dirty, sweaty butt on the cover, which I’m kind of a sucker for.