Blame The Existence Of ‘Fifty Shades Of Grey’ On The Black Eyed Peas

Hero of women wearing Tweety Bird sweatshirts everywhere, Fifty Shades of Grey author EL James recently spoke to Buisness Insider about Fifty Shades of Grey: The Classical Album and, well, grab your Christian Grey-branded vomit troth which you’ve been lately using as some weird sex toy involving shame.

What songs do you think are best for making love to?

I think these things are in the eye of the beholder. I have songs that I write sex to. One of them is the Black Eyed Peas’ Sexy. That’s a very sexy song. And that’s all I’m prepared to tell you. Because if I told you the other ones you wouldn’t believe it. (Via)

Here’s one verse from “Sexy,” which appears on 2003’s Elephunk (and the Be Cool soundtrack!).

You take me to ecstasy
Without takin’ ecstasy
It’s exactly like ecstasy
When you layin’ right next to me
I’m sexin’ you
Sexin’ you
You sexin’ me
Sexin’ me

Suddenly James’s prose makes a lot more sense. Let’s name off some songs that are sexier than “Sexy”:

  • “Belsen Was a Gas” by the Sex Pistols
  • Michael Bolton’s cover of “Like a Rolling Stone”
  • “Abomination of Unnecessarily Augmented Composition Monickers” by Anal C*nt
  • “Der Hölle Rache kocht in meinem Herzen”
  • Louie’s “sh*tting in Hitler’s mouth” song
  • “”Unholy Black Metal” by Darkthrone
  • “Hangnail” by Nickelback

This list could go on for forever.

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