Ahh, the age of manufactured outrage. Where your ticket to fame is no further than a faked anonymous note, receipt, or passive aggressive sign. Just post that sucker to social media, and viola! Sit back and watch as the unearned anger comes rolling in. Such was the case of Texas pastor Jordan Brown, who made headlines this week by claiming that a Whole Foods in Austin had given him a cake that he had ordered with the message “LOVE WINS” changed to “LOVE WINS F*G” upon his receipt.
Brown very reasonably posted images of the offending cake to social media, as well as documenting the “unboxing” on YouTube.
He also lawyered up, and spoke to Austin’s KEYE-TV about the injustice:
“As a 30-year-old openly gay pastor, I have had to face years of discrimination and judgement for something that I had no control over,” Brown says. He explains that trauma resurfaced Thursday with the incident involving the cake.
There were only a few small problems with Brown’s claims. Namely that the incident allegedly took place at a A) Whole Foods in B) Austin, which happens to be one of the most progressive food-store chains in the country, in the most progressive city in Texas. Brown claims that he didn’t notice the slur until after he left the store, but that seems to be unlikely based upon the very images that he posted, in which it can be seen clear as day through the clear packaging. Even if he hadn’t noticed, surely the cashier would have.
Also many were quick to point out that the icing on the offending word didn’t seem to match the icing on the rest of the cake. As one Uproxx staffer who will go unnamed pointed out: “As a former cake decorator in my youth, I know that if you’re gonna hit that ‘Love Wins’ so tight at the top, there’s no way you’re gonna be loose and sloppy in the middle. Also, why not take up more real estate?”
Hmm! Yes, good points, indeed. As such, these points were not lost on Whole Foods itself, which investigated Brown’s claims and found them to be fraudulent. The company is now planning to take legal action against both Brown and his attorney, as it released in a statement.
“After a deeper investigation of Mr. Brown’s claim, we believe his accusations are fraudulent and we intend to take legal action against both Mr. Brown and his attorney,” the company said in the statement.
“We stand behind our bakery team member, who is part of the LGBTQ community, and we appreciate the team members and shoppers who recognize that this claim is completely false and directly contradicts Whole Foods Market’s inclusive culture, which celebrates diversity,” the company said.
To further prove the innocence of their employee, Whole Foods even released security footage of the incident to the company’s YouTube account, which allegedly proves that Brown’s claims are false.
The moral of the story here is don’t lie; don’t lie, poorly, on the internet; and if you absolutely feel like you have to lie poorly on the internet, don’t lie about a company that can come back and crush you like a bug.