The Sex Calculator Will Tell You How Many People You’ve Actually Slept With

Every time you sleep with someone, you’re sleeping with everyone they’ve slept with. I learned that in high school, though my teacher forgot to mention that you should never have sex with someone in an It Follows situation. She was too busy trying to scare us into abstinence.

I can only imagine how many times she’s already checked out Lloyds Pharmacy’s Sex Degrees of Separation sex calculator (I thought they closed that place down), which “calculates how many partners you may have come into indirect contact with over the course of your sexual history,” according to Mic. The website is loading slowly, probably due to a traffic surge (or all the horndogs at ol’ Lloyds have gone to the doctor’s office with “an itch”), but here’s what it looks like.

A gentleman never tells, unless it’s a sex calculator, then it’s fine.

A spokesperson at Lloyds, Dr. Gigi Taguri, said, “Your risk of being exposed to an STI increases exponentially with each new partner. But importantly it’s not just your direct partners that you have to worry about, but your partners’ partners, and their partners’ partners, and so on. They are indirect sexual connections.” I like those odds, replies literally everyone.

Try out the calculator here.

(Via Mic and Lloyds)

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