Recap: A new HOH takes control on ‘Big Brother’

So, let’s see if we can all sort this out, shall we? Last week Brendon got the boot, Rachel was on the block and was almost certain to go home with Kalia in the HOH position, but then Kalia freaked out, Lawon wanted superpowers and suggested himself for the block, Lawon actually went home and Brendon came back. Do you have whiplash? I certainly do. And thanks to all the leaks on the Internet, it sounds like we’re going to get smacked with another reversal tonight. Remember how I said things were getting a little dull a few weeks ago with the vets dominating the house? I take that back. 

So, after having Rachel wrap herself around Brendon in a way that’s possibly not fit for prime time, her Prince Charming has to strut around the house like a conquering superhero. He’s so glad to be back! Rachel is so glad the dynamic duo is back together! I’m almost wishing Brendon wasn’t back simply because Rachel just referred to them as the dynamic duo. Jordan’s just relieved she doesn’t have to babysit Crazypants anymore. 

Meanwhile, Kalia can’t believe America chose Brendon over Dominic. Really? Everything Kalia worked SO HARD for in the whole week she was HOH has been DESTROYED. Um, Kalia? This was pretty much all your fault. Not to point fingers or anything. 

Time for the HOH competition! It’s a counting game, which is just as boring as it is when your local supermarket fills a gigantic jar with jellybeans and tries to convince you that, just by guessing the right number, you could win a fabulous prize that still won’t make up for the time you’ll waste trying to count jellybeans in the middle of the produce aisle. Daniele is nervous, because numbers are like a foreign language to her. Don’t worry, Daniele, you’re just counting. You won’t be doing calculus or anything.

Apparently no one else in the house is very good at counting, though, so Daniele has even less reason to fret. Rachel is first out in the HOH competition. Rachel can’t believe it! Jordan’s out next. This is not looking good for the veterans. Next out is Brendon. Daniele is SO excited. Kalia is SO excited. Then, Jeff’s out. The veterans’ alliance is counting on Adam and Shelly, and we know how many contests they’ve won. Oh, wait, they haven’t won anything. Next, Shelly’s out. And then Adam’s out. It’s down to Daniele and Porsche. Gee, let me guess. Daniele wins it. You can bet she won’t make the mistake Kalia made of trying to play nice with the veterans. Right? 

Brendon and Rachel wonder if they can convince Daniele to put Shelly on the block. Meanwhile, Daniele and Kalia decide they’re done with Shelly. Wow, for someone who’s meticulously played each side of the house, Shelly is not exactly Miss Popular this week.

During the hamsters’ downtime, Jeff suggests that Shelly try conducting a mock job interview with Jordan so that one day she’ll be able to do something other than answer phones. Unfortunately, the interview proves that Jordan should probably stick with answering phones. I hope she invested her “Big Brother” money well, though I think Jordan may have lost the check or forgotten the name of her bank. 

But forget job interviews — it’s time to kiss Daniele’s HOH butt! Adam tries to make a deal with Daniele. Given that all he can offer is to not put her on the block next week IF he wins HOH, she says she’ll think about it. Adam has pretty much been an affable floater in this competition, so Daniele doesn’t have much reason to give him anything. Besides, she’s probably going after Brenchel, right? Right? 

Shelly kisses Daniele’s butt next. Unfortunately, the butt kissing does not go over so well. Daniele tells Shelly she’s on to her siding with the veterans, so Shelly begins furiously spinning. She tries to convince Daniele that that’s ridiculous and that the only reason she doesn’t hang out with Daniele and Kalia 24/7 is because she feels too uncool to reside in their fabulousness. Oddly enough, Daniele doesn’t buy any of Shelly’s backpedaling, which probably works fine on Shelly’s eight-year-old but is not so effective on grown-ups. 

Kalia and Porsche decide that Shelly’s a piece of crap, though Porsche doesn’t say crap. So much hate on Shelly this week! I suspect people who have been watching the live feed undoubtedly know more to this particular story, because it does seem like a pretty sudden reversal on the Shelly front. Next, Shelly and Porsche get into it. Porshe accuses Shelly of having a final three deal with Rachel and Brendon. Shelly denies it and decides Rachel is a hateful snitch. Is it me or is Shelly unraveling a little bit? 

Next to enter Daniele’s lair are Brendon and Rachel. Brenchel presents a deal to Daniele, suggesting they call a truce and not inform the rest of the house. Like Rachel can keep that to herself. Daniele, oddly enough, seems to be considering it. Really? I mean, I kind of like Brenchel staying in the house simply because they’re so damn crazy, but I find it hard to believe Daniele would want to keep two strong competitors who, until fairly recently, were gunning for her. Nah, she won’t take the deal, will she?

Time for nominations. The big rotary dial of doom hits the table. One of these days, a hamster will throw out his or her back lugging it to the table. Just a thought. 

The first person safe is… Kalia.

The second person safe is… Porsche.

The third person safe is… Jordan.

The fourth person safe is… Jeff.

The fifth person safe is… Rachel. What? Did I hear that right?

The sixth person safe is… Brendon. Excuse me, I dropped my jaw onto the floor. Have to go pick it up. 

WHOA. Really? Daniele is going after floaters? With the veteran alliance still in the house? Am I missing something? I guess the deal (which Brendon suggested could stick for up to three weeks) might have some merit, but I can’t believe she’d take the risk.

Shelly is furious! She’s sobbing! She hates Rachel! Shelly will not let Rachel ruin her classy game! Not that Shelly hasn’t been lying and backstabbing with the best of them! 

Adam is a little more Zen about it. Then again, he’s used to being on the block, so I guess he has to be.

Hmmm, Daniele isn’t quite as in love with Brenchel as it seems. If the nominations stay the same, fine, but if not? She’ll happily backdoor Brendon. Well, it’s good to see Daniele hasn’t completely lost her game. Or her mind.

Do you think Daniele is making the right move? Do you think Shelly’s losing it? And do you think Jordan might actually win again?

×