Recap: ‘America’s Next Top Model’ – ‘Kathy Griffin’

As we open this next episode of America”s Next Top Model, we see what Bianca looks like without her mommy bodyguard sister best friend, Bre, who was eliminated last week. 

 

“I don”t have a clique,” says Bianca. Yes, honey, but you do have an agency, so why aren”t you delivering better photos? 

 

Shannon, meanwhile, reminds us that she won”t do “raunchy,” which, in her world, means posing in a bra. Kayla, meanwhile, worries that lacks the personality to compete with bitchy Bianca. This is in the only cycle in which Kayla actually might have something to worry about.

 

The first challenge arrives. The girls are going to design their own signature fragrance. Ben Bennett, founder of Hatch Beauty, is there to render olfactory aid. 

 

Lisa wants her scent to be called Neon. Well, fair enough. Shannon, of course, chooses “pure” and “angelic” notes. Allison wants something called “honey blood,” because she still has a fascination with blood. To his credit, Bennett does not blink, overmuch.

 

Diaminatrix? Did we spell that out right, Alexandria? That”s the name she wants, but she takes her time smelling every scent in the place. She has not changed since her last season.

 

Enter noted fashion photographer Nigel Barker, who announces that the girls must introduce their fragrances to the public from a bathtub. Live. The winner of the challenge gets immunity from elimination.

 

“Candid” Bianca immediately goes backstage and begins to complain about selling a perfume out of a bathtub. Tyra would never do that, she says. 

 

Eva, cycle winner from forever ago, arrives for the fragrance party. Random people are also there, judging the girls as they operate out of their tubs. Nobody seems to get Honey Blood. Lisa dances in her tub, of course. 

 

“I had a good time because Lisa was having a good time,” Eva remarks.

 

“Candid and frown don”t go together,” Nigel tells Bianca.

 

“OK, Nigel,” Bianca sasses.

 

Bye, honey. 

 

“Shannon is caught up in being this idea of what Shannon should be,” Eva criticizes. But Nigel seems impressed. 

 

“I”m Smitten,” he says, and jumps in a tub to prove it.

 

The winner? Lisa. She gets to actually launch her fragrance. 

 

Here comes a photo shoot, and this one is a night shoot. The girls will be doing this shoot on the backs of motorcycles. Mr. Jay wants the inspiration to be tacky-ass reality TV stars, such as NeNe Leakes or Snooki. Didn”t Alexandria just get criticized for embodying a reality TV personality? Can she ever win?

 

“I don”t watch The Jersey Shore,” Shannon sniffs. Obviously not.

 

Laura does a great job leaving her comfort zone, which is the point of the challenge. Kayla gets a little distracted by street gawkers. She disappoints the photographer.

 

Angelea is way too toned down for this shoot. Bianca, of all people, coaches Lisa about who NeNe Leakes is; the result is magic, darling. And who knew Allison could channel Snooki? 

 

Dominique seems to take the most risks, and that is not lost on the photographer. 

 

Bianca bogarts a jar of pickles (Snooki”s favorite) and doesn”t let anyone else have any. Neither the photographer nor Mr. Jay is impressed at all.

 

Alexandria gets stuck in an amateurish rut, while Shannon refuses to move out of her comfort zone. 

 

Back at the house, all the girls are expecting a double elimination either this week or next. If there a God, and Shannon says there is, then let”s see her go home. And Bianca too. 

 

At panel, bombshell! Kathy Griffin is there!

 

“Walk, bitches walk!” she says. She jokes that Tyra has been fired, ha ha, but of course there Tyra is, along with Barker and Andre Leon Talley. Tyra also announces there will be a Top Model fragrance, and this cycle”s winner will be the face of said scent.

 

The NeNes rule, particularly Angelea, Lisa. Laura”s is good too, though Nigel finds it amateur. Tyra even likes Alexandria”s NeNe. The panel likes Dominique”s Snooki. Here comes Kayla, who does not deliver Snooki or any sort of reality trash. Allison delivers an oddly awesome Snooki, while Bianca looks “passed out on a guy,” per Griffin. 

 

Bianca is asked why she didn”t get in the bathtub for the last challenge. She says Beyonce would never get in a tub.

 

“You”re not Beyonce, Bianca, you”re trying to get somewhere,” Tyra scolds, “If I was you, and that was the assignment, I would do it, and I would do it and try to win.”

 

So much for Tyra-would-never-do-that.

 

Shannon is next. Tyra indicates that she has lost all of her fire since she first appeared on Top Model back in the Stone Age.

 

So who goes home? Two people! The girls were right! Double elimination in the offing.

 

The callout: Lisa, Angelea, Laura, Alexandria, Honey Blood, Dominique.

 

Bottom three: Shannon, Kayla and Bianca.

 

Shannon gets scolded for being too boring to remember. Kayla gets clobbered for being too boring for this cycle. And Bianca is just the opposite; the judges “fear you are not coachable,” Tyra says.

 

Shannon, of all people, gets to stay. Kayla and Bianca are sent home. 

 

“Don”t be boring,” Tyra warns Shannon.

 

Next week: The girls star in their own rap videos. Really. Even Honey Blood.

 

Did the right two models head home?