Today’s Rape Van: This guy seems legit

I took this myself in San Francisco yesterday.  I wonder what kind of “spiritual counseling” goes on there.  I bet it’s very hands-on. Just as an aside, it was filled with black trash bags.

MORNING LINKS

“Bieber-impersonating porn dude will jack it for you if you buy him stuff on Amazon.” |Uproxx|

Of COURSE China built a sperm-collecting machine. So did the US, ours is called “Paris Hilton.” |GammaSquad|

Chuck Lorre is rebooting Two and a Half Men.  Of course he is. |WarmingGlow|

Video of a figure skater breaking his nose. |WithLeather|

Check out our Koi-related prank calls on this week’s Frotcast, including “Koi Skin Vest” and “Otter Car.” |Frotcast|

The KSK draft day mailbag. |KissingSuzyKolber|

Propaganda posters for the modern workplace. |TheDailyWhat|

“Gloria Allred demonstrates gay anal sex.” |BostonStool|

40 busty British babes Prince William should’ve married. |BroBible|

Here’s a Royal Wedding drinking game, which you can play if you’re not already playing my “chug if you don’t give a f*ck about the royal wedding” game. |Buzzfeed|

The 15 most badass baldies in film. |NextMovie|

Here’s Olivia Munn eating Carl’s Jr. in a bikini. |WWTDD|

January Jones is pregnant.  Oh boy, I can’t wait for her boobs to get bigger! |TheSuperficial|

Memoir of a child after bring your child to work today. |HolyTaco|

Pick a godd*mn release date, Apollo 18. |ScreenJunkies|

Don’t forget, LA people, tonight is Horrible Movie Night. |HMN|

Are you a lady, a S, 2X or 3X? BUY A FILMDRUNK SHIRT! Those Ls and XLs will thank you when I can print more. |FilmDrunkShirts|

NOMINATE FOR COMMENTS OF THE WEEK. BUY FILMDRUNK SHIRTS. THE FROTCAST (OUR PODCAST) ON iTUNES. FILMDRUNK ON FACEBOOK. FILMDRUNK ON TWITTER.