It seems as if we’re on the verge of descending into a brand new Cold War with Russia’s occupation of the Crimean peninsula. So far it seems mostly like an opportunistic act of naked aggression by Putin, but can we really trust our biased and ignorant Western news outlets? Appearing on RT, formerly Russia Today, a non-profit news network funded by Russia that has been accused of being a mouthpiece for the Kremlin (read Glenn Greenwald on that), semi-regular guest Steven Seagal says no, we can’t trust our media. And who better to explain history and geopolitics than a guy who famously claimed to keep track of neither space nor time?
I’ve transcribed the whole appearance below, but here’s the gist of it. And be sure to pay special attention to the 1:30 mark, for the first time Seagal pronounces “Ukraine.” (Incidentally, he and the host got through the entire five minutes without either ever once saying the word “Crimea.” Impressive.).
HOST: Do you think the media is playing a role in ramping up tensions between counties?]
SEAGAL: Yes. I do. You know, the answer I gave a minute ago is a perfect example. You know, I’ll give you another example. On supposedly quote unquote respectable news channels, they keep saying ‘just like when Russia attacked Georgia…’ Really? How about telling the truth? Didn’t Georgia attack Russia, and didn’t Russia retaliate? Maybe people should either do their homework, or, you know, just stop saying what they’re told to say.
HOST: Do you think politicians are trying to hold Obama’s feet to the fire and force him to act?]
SEAGAL: I think this is a very dangerous stance to take and a very dangerous game to play. Nobody should be criticizing Obama for not taking military action, I mean are they crazy? At this point, what we really want are cool heads and diplomatic dialog. We should be at the heighth of diplomatic diplomacy right now.
Something tells me there isn’t much that Steven Seagal doesn’t describe as “playing a dangerous game.” “Mr. Seagal, we’re out of meatball subs today.”
“…You’re playing a dangerous game, my friend.”
Though I do agree that we should be at the heighth of diplomatic diplomacy right now. But what are Steven Seagal’s qualifications? Well, Seagal has claimed to have worked with the CIA, is set to become “the face of the Russian arms industry,” and I believe even has a degree in international relations from Upstairs Fullerton Martial Arts College.
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Full Transcript:
SEAGAL: It’s exactly the kind of thing that we – meaning myself and several members of congress – were trying to avoid. I hear a lot of political rhetoric, i hear a lot of political spinning. And, um… I’m not, in America, hearing anything from the Russians at all. And that’s not because they’re not giving comments, I think that they’re just not being heard. For example, I heard early this morning someone saying ‘Yeah, somebody came on to a vessel in th Black Sea, and you know, threatened them, and said, you know, by five o’clock surrender or we’re going to come and invade.’
I knew right away that that never happened. And sure enough, in the last hour now they’re saying that might not have happened. All this kind of stuff is not constructive to real diplomatic relations. And that’s what we need here. We need calm. We need people who can look at the big picture and what’s best for Ooo-Kraiyeen, what’s best for Russia… and not necessarily what’s best for quote unquote “Europe.”
The thing that I think we have to really keep in mind here is that… recently when Ooo-kraiyeen was quote unquote overthrown, you hav ego keep in mind it was a democratically… voted on, put in… it was a government that was put in through normal diplomatic channels. Through voting and so forth and so on. Then all of a sudden… it looks to me like thugs with firebombs started firebombing the whole city. And who these people are and where they came from is really a questionable subject. And then of a sudden this government is toppled. You know, I certainly think that there is… the point of… why couldn’t they have… sort of… used proper diplomatic means to change the government, which is what we always hope for. You know, so… I just think it’s very very interesting that there’s all this funny stuff happening right before the Olympics.
HOST: What is the US interest in Ukraine?
SEAGAL: In my opinion it’s European Union, it’s pressure that certain entities are getting from the European Union or stuff like that. It’s kind of like, if you’ll harken back or go do your homework, you’ll remember that Margaret Thatcher was pretty much thrown out of office because, you know, she refused to put the EU in. And so.. I think there’s a little bit of that going on here.
HOST: Do you think the media is playing a role in ramping up tensions between counties?
SEAGAL: Yes. I do. You know, the answer I gave a minute ago is a perfect example. You know, I’ll give you another example. On supposedly quote unquote respectable news channels, they keep saying ‘just like when Russia attacked Georgia…’ Really? How about telling the truth? Didn’t Georgia attack Russia, and didn’t Russia retaliate? Maybe people should either do their homework, or, you know, just stop saying what they’re told to say.
HOST: Do you think politicians are trying to hold Obama’s feet to the fire and force him to act?]
SEAGAL: I think this is a very dangerous stance to take and a very dangerous game to play. Nobody should be criticizing Obama for not taking military action, I mean are they crazy? At this point, what we really want are cool heads and diplomatic dialog. We should be at the heighth of diplomatic diplomacy right now.