If Twitter has proven itself good for anything, it’s supplying millions of people with an endless treasury of jokes that they can rip off when they can’t think of any on their own. The latest such example comes to us courtesy of Ebola, that horrifying and deadly disease that has made its way to the United States and supplied cable news networks with the ultimate way to scare the sh*t out of their viewers. Fortunately, there have been some more level-headed people, like Shep Smith, trying to remind everyone not to freak out, because it’s not like we’re walking outside, breathing in some infected air and turning inside out like on The Simpsons. Others, though, have reminded us to not freak out about people freaking out, because it could be worse.
Since humor is often seen as a way for people to calm everyone down, someone somewhere made the joke: “More Americans have married Kim Kardashian than have died from Ebola.” Funny, right? Because Kardashian has been married three times and only one American has reportedly died from Ebola. Because people love to laugh in the face of terror and death, that joke has become Twitter’s MEME OF THE DAY. The snowball that started the avalanche looked something like this…
I have no clue who first told the joke or made the above image (my guess is Men’s Humor or a Willy Wonka parody account, because they’re HILARIOUS), but the crowd has torn it down from the Louvre and taken it into the town square, leading to…
FACT: More Americans have been married to Kim Kardashian than have died from #Ebola pic.twitter.com/SxO0oJxG1T (via @stevegoodair, @sbadsgood)
— Jeremy Vine (@theJeremyVine) October 20, 2014
https://twitter.com/Chouloute_/status/524057369421291520
More Americans have been married to @KimKardashian then have died from Ebola. I'm glad Kanye stopped that outbreak.
— James Vlcek (@JimiVfoundation) October 21, 2014
Wait, how many Americans have married Kim Kardashian and then caught Ebola? That should probably be investigated by the CDC.
https://twitter.com/TheBardockObama/status/524037662983069697
https://twitter.com/_Snape_/status/524371205587886080
I read somewhere that more Americans have been married to Kim Kardashian than died of Ebola. Still, I'm afraid of both.
— Mike Wise (@MikeWiseguy) October 20, 2014
I read that, too. No clue where, but I definitely read it.
My favourite stat of the day; more Americans have been married to Kim Kardashian than have died from Ebola
— Paul Bolt (@pbolt) October 19, 2014
More Americans have been married to Kim Kardashian than have died of Ebola
— prozac efron (@melbatoastmarie) October 19, 2014
Guys think of it this way.
More Americans have been married to Kim Kardashian than have died from Ebola.#yourewelcome #ebolafact
— zack dearing (@zackydear) October 21, 2014
Did you know more Americans have married Kim Kardashian than died from Ebola? #funfact #bowlashit
— Reed Waddle (@reedwaddle) October 21, 2014
To all of you getting all frightened by FOX and CNN: more Americans have been married to Kim Kardashian than have died from Ebola.
— Kevin A. Hill (@Perfesser_Hill) October 21, 2014
"More Americans have been married to Kim Kardashian than have died from Ebola" – my history professor
— maddie luff (@LUFFisallyaneed) October 21, 2014
More Americans have married Kim Kardashian than have died of Ebola http://t.co/im71JwQS67
— HuffPost (@HuffPost) October 21, 2014
Of course it qualifies as something you didn’t know about Kim Kardashian.
And that’s just a small sample. There are thousands of those Tweets, if not more. The joke is so “good,” though, that more clever pranksters have taken it a step further and swapped out Kim Kardashian for Taylor Swift, because she has dated a lot of guys, you see.
Remember, more Americans have been dumped by Taylor Swift than have died of #Ebola. pic.twitter.com/exW5Pvz9Tu
— Cloture Club (@ClotureClub) October 17, 2014
More Americans have been dumped by Taylor Swift than have been infected with Ebola. So what’s the real epidemic? Merica.
— Cloyd Rivers (@CloydRivers) October 20, 2014
https://twitter.com/USAPartyStory/status/523949306144100352
More Americans have been dumped by Taylor Swift than have been officially diagnosed with Ebola. You're gonna be just fine. #CLEbola
— Aly (@AlyTannerRadio) October 18, 2014
https://twitter.com/AllbrightNFL/status/523202706966450176
https://twitter.com/RobinMagritte/status/524600599476592640
More Americans have broken up with @taylorswift13 than have been infected by Ebola. #truestory
— Bobby (@BobbysonofBobby) October 21, 2014
More Americans have been dumped by Taylor Swift than have died from Ebola
— Alexa Molitor (@alexxa630) October 21, 2014
However, I’d point out that Kardashian is a better subject because she has married three men. Swift has dated way more than three guys, but now I, like Swift, am just being picky. Pop culture fans aren’t the only people knocking off this joke either. It was only a matter of time before someone got political with it, since politicians love to get married a lot, too.
https://twitter.com/threadtangler/status/524606549537210368
Although, I have to admit that I’m a sucker for this one…
https://twitter.com/cd_hooks/status/523979352367575041
The whole “That person has been married a lot!” routine is kind of mean, so let’s switch over to a more light-hearted play on the same joke.
More Americans have been Batman than gotten Ebola
— Wonderella.bsky.social (@wonderella) October 19, 2014
Statistically, Americans have had a better chance of starring in a Batman film than contracting Ebola in-country.
— Dan Primack (@danprimack) October 20, 2014
Really, there are so many people and characters that work in this joke that you could make a million of them, like: More Americans have played Michelle Tanner than have died from Ebola. More Americans have played quarterback for the Washington Redskins this season than have died from Ebola. More Americans have been removed from Kate Gosselin than have died from Ebola. Or…
https://twitter.com/UncleChaps/status/523162265437368320
Wait, no. I think that one might be too much. But you get the point.