And now, a sex robot sucking on a sausage. Do not click on this unless you want to be severely disturbed. Last I checked, that included oh… all of you. You’re already watching it, aren’t you. Crazy, right? I like how the video says “You can imagine what else she likes to suck on!” Gosh, are you sure I can, Sexbot video? I’m not very creative! I hope this isn’t an actual product, but a way to ferret out people who should be on the sex offender registry. “Check out our new sausage-sucking sexbot! She’s got three working orifices, including a fully-functional uncanny valley!” And it has all the unblinking eyes and rigor mortis lips to which I’ve become accustomed?! Hold the phone while I find my hooker-skinned wallet! [Fark]
MORNING LINKS
Flowchart To Determine Your Star Wars Occupation. |Uproxx|
You know who else likes to say “literally” a lot? The Google CEO. (On the plus side, he seems to use it correctly…) |TheDailyWhat|
Who Stole The Corpse Of An Italian Game Show Host? |UproxxNews|
And here’s a sweet brawl inside a McDonald’s. |BostonBarstoolSports|
Culture Clash: Baby Sloths vs. Classic Literature. |Uproxx|
The 10 Worst Shows to Be Top-20 Hits. |WarmingGlow|
Facebook To Get Oregon Trail? |GammaSquad|
12 Memes You Should Know By Now |NextRound|
James Cameron is on Twitter, yo. |ScreenJunkies|
Comic Book Artists Reimagine Criterion Movie Covers. |Moviefone|
The best picture nominees, in Lego form. |NextMovie|
The seven best lines from Nic Cage’s Season of the Witch. |HolyTaco|
The Life And Times Of MF DOOM. |SmokingSection|
Supercut: The Movie Alphabet. |Buzzfeed|
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And finally, here’s a rough approximation of my reaction to the banner video: