I get my box stuffed full of long PR emails all day, but the most satisfying ones are usually the porn ones, and not just because they come with pictures of naked ladies. I mean, just get a load of this synopsis for Dreamzone’s Karate Kid XXX. Hollywood could really take a lesson from Chatsworth when it comes to putting a new spin on an old classic.
Wax on, (*whacks off*):
VAN NUYS, CA — DreamZone Entertainment launches its official website, www.karatekidxxx.com, for their newest blockbuster feature-length parody, ‘Karate Kid XXX: A DreamZone Parody’. The porn satire of the 1984 romantic martial arts film is set to release on May 14th.
With high hopes of porn stardom, Daniel’s mother moves the family out to California. While she pursues her dreams and every dick in town, Daniel aspires to fend off the local bullies. Sympathetic to his plight, Daniel’s perverted neighbor Mr. Miyagi trains him to fight. With the All-Valley Karate Tournament just a day away, will Daniel be ready? Will his insatiable mother stop craving cock? Will a double-penetration scene slow down the evil Cobra Kai? Answers to these questions and more are revealed in ‘The Karate Kid XXX’.
Hollywood’s Karate Kid remake: Stuck Will Smith’s kid in it, made Mr. Miyagi Chinese, still called it “karate” even though karate is Japanese.
Chatsworth’s Karate Kid remake: Made Daniel’s mom a slut, made Mr. Miyagi a pervert, added double penetration.
Advantage: Chatsworth.