Opening Everywhere: Delivery Man, The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
Opening Somewhere: Philomena, The Christmas Candle
FilmDrunk Suggests: Everyone seems to like The Hunger Games: Catching Fire, especially since that Jennifer Lawrence is such a nice girl. But Delivery Man uses that catchy song from all those commercials in its commercial. I’m so torn!
Delivery Man
Rotten Tomatoes Scores: 39% critics, 60% audience
Gratuitous Review Quotes:
Calling Delivery Man a “comedy” is a bit of a stretch, because it’s rarely funny. Dumb, yes, but not in a way that’s worthy of more than a half-hearted chuckle. – James Berardinelli, ReelViews
Vaughn never quite convinces as the perpetual slacker in this blue-collar family (he doesn’t even look like he’s from the same gene pool) and too many of the characters feel puppeteered into place; you can see all the strings. – Stephen Whitty, Newark Star-Ledger
Armchair Analysis: This could be the best movie ever. Like, the BEST. MOVIE. EVER. And everyone could rave about it, and the Oscars could be canceled because it wouldn’t be fair to any of the other movies. But I just can’t take these Phillip Phillips songs anymore and it’s affecting my entire life. “Gone Gone Gone” and “Home” are driving me to the brink of a meltdown, and I’ll soon be running down a busy highway naked and screaming, “I WOULD DO IT FOR YOUUUUUUUUUUUU!”
Also, is this poster the most Vince Vaughn movie poster ever? I say yes.
The Hunger Games: Catching Fire
Rotten Tomatoes Scores: 89% critics, 94% audience
Gratuitous Review Quotes:
Catching Fire delivers on the grim, roiling promises of the original. – Lisa Kennedy, Denver Post
Though some of the chases and escapes are thrillingly filmed, this last section of the film feels indistinguishable from plenty of other video-game-style avoid-the-obstacle action climaxes. – Dana Stevens, Slate
Armchair Analysis: Yeah, yeah, this is the bigger movie this weekend, but I really wanted to vent about Phillip Phillips. Plus, everyone basically loves this movie, so what else is there to discuss?
Philomena
Rotten Tomatoes Scores: 91% critics, 92% audience
Gratuitous Review Quotes:
If not for the expertness of [the] actors, Philomena would be a sloggy journey indeed. Fortunately, Dench and Coogan are more than capable of turning water into wine. – Peter Rainer, Christian Science Monitor
The movie is overcalculating and occasionally coarse, but it has a gentle spirit. We should count its existence as a blessing. – David Edelstein, Vulture
Armchair Analysis: I think this movie looks adorable. Like, I’d tell all my bros I’m going to see Bad Grandpa again, because “that sh*t’s hilarious, bro!” but in reality I’d be seeing Philomena and smiling at the old ladies in the theater because we all know how important family is.
The Christmas Candle
Rotten Tomatoes Scores: 15% critics, 74% audience
Gratuitous Review Quotes:
Melds the intriguing with the hokey in a variation on the standard template of a nonbeliever who changes his outlook amid a holiday miracle. – Kyle Smith, New York Post
Relates the weak-tea parable of a town that receives a wish-giving candle every 25 years from an angel. – Nicolas Rapold, New York Times
Armchair Analysis: BAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HUMBUG.