So, Resident Evil 6 hasn’t got great reviews, which means the franchise is on the rocks! Finished! Back to the drawing board! Because the power of video game reviewers is absolute dammit. Or maybe not.
Here are 9 games reviewers took a critical dump on, yet went on to make giant piles of money anyways…
Note – I’m using VGChartz for these sales figures. Yeah, they do some estimating and aren’t 100% accurate, but guess what? Those “official” NPD numbers are just estimates too (numerous retailers like say, Walmart aren’t even tracked). VGChartz is close enough for the purposes of a light article like this. Also, in many cases the numbers I’m giving are combined sales across several platforms.
Just Dance
The Critical Consensus:
What the hell? All you do is hold a Wiimote while dancing! Wiimotes are stupid, dancing is stupid, and this is a stupid, stupid game.
Metacritic Score: 49
The Sales:
The first Just Dance did nearly 7 million in sales. Just Dance 2 and 3 both did almost 10 million. Jeez, who knew this whole “dancing” thing would catch on?
Resident Evil: Operation Raccoon City
The Critical Consensus:
A clunky, cheap looking shooter. The multiplayer was already done much better by the Left 4 Dead games.
Metacritic Score: 52
The Sales:
Over 1.5 mil so far and still going strong. Hey, if the Resident Evil name can turn a 52 Metacritic score into a million seller, imagine what it can do with RE6’s 66 score! You’re saved Capcom!
Cooking Mama
The Critical Consensus:
Cooking? I’m not sure what that is. Is it that thing they do with the squirt guns behind the Taco Bell counter? Oh, and I don’t even get to eat the things I cook in this game? What...ever.
Metacritic Score: 67 (the average score of all the Cooking Mama games is 63)
The Sales:
The first Cooking Mama game sold over 5 million copies. The series has sold nearly 15 million. Think of your favorite video game series — unless you’re thinking about something like Mario, Pokemon or Call of Duty there’s a good chance Cooking Mama has sold more than it.
The Mario Party Games
The Critical Consensus:
If reviewers could post a five-second video of them making a wanking motion as a review, that’s what most of them would give Mario Party.
Metacritic Average of the last 5 Mario Party Games: 68
The Sales:
The Mario Party series is Nintendo’s money-spinning secret weapon. The last five games have sold a combined 21 million or so.
Dead Island
The Critical Consensus:
Clunky controls, a lack of anything remotely scary and a bloated torso’s worth of bugs hinders the promising “open-world zombie” RPG concept.
Metacritic Score: 71 (not as bad as some of the scores listed here, but still low considering the hype)
The Sales:
Nearly 3.5 million. I doubt Dead Island’s relatively small-time publisher Deep Silver is complaining about sales like that.
Devil May Cry 2
The Critical Consensus:
Hey look, more Capcom! What happened to the style, challenge and polish of the original Devil May Cry?
Metacritic Score: 66
The Sales:
Almost 2 million, putting it right in the same range as all the other, better, Devil May Cry games.
Tony Hawk: Ride
The Critical Response:
What the hell? This is even worse than motion controls! I have to stand up and balance on a thing to play? I don’t care how good Pro Skater 2 was, you’re dead to me Tony Hawk!
Metacritic Score: 44
The Sales:
Almost 2 million. Also, take into account the fact that Activision was selling this game for 120 freakin’ dollars. Activision made their money back on this one, no problem.
Star Wars: The Force Unleashed
The Critical Consensus:
Grumble mumble, Episode 1, mumble moan, George Lucas, mumble glarble blarg.
Metacritic Score: 71
The Sales:
Over 9 million combined sales over all platforms. That, for the record, makes it the best selling Star Wars game not to star Lego minifigures. The sequel, which had an even lower Metacritic score (63) sold another 3 million.
Anything Sonic
The Critical Consensus:
Sonic games are…not…good. They’ve never been good, they never will be good, there’s no alternate universe where it’s possible for Sonic to be good! For the love of God, stop buying Sonic games.
Metacritic Lowlights: Sonic the Hedgehog (2006) 43, Shadow the Hedgehog 45, Sonic Unleashed 60
The Sales:
Sonic’s core fans are so loyal that it’s pretty much impossible for a multi-platform Sonic game to sell fewer than around 2 million copies, no matter how bad. The 2006 Sonic the Hedgehog sold a little over 2 mil, Shadow sold just a little under, and the ridiculous werehog starring Sonic Unleashed pulled in nearly 4.5 million.