Didn’t you enjoy the brawl between the two Joes this week? I can’t condone violence, but I can laugh hysterically at the black stuff mystery. This dirty whodunnit was eventually solved when Joe Gorga admitted he SPRAY PAINTS HIS HAIR. Poor Melissa was fingered for the smudges when Teresa and Joe Giudice decided it was her stripperiffic make-up smearing all over the place. Of course, even when all evidence points elsewhere, they’d blame Melissa.
With the attendees having scared off the mild-mannered “team builders” (I’m pretty sure that when the cameras were turned off, they found a quiet corner in which to sob), it’s left to Dr. V of “L.A. Shrinks” to come to the rescue. It seems pretty clear that the team builders were set up to fail in order to make Dr. V (whom followers of lesser-than Bravo shows already know to be apecrap crazy) look like a genius. But let’s face it; after the Joes rip one another to shreds and everyone else cries a great deal, they’re too tired to fight anymore. Cue Dr. V!
In no time at all, Dr. V gets Teresa and Joe Gorga to sit down together, express their feelings and, yes, hug it out. Wow! If I didn’t believe this show was becoming more intensely scripted by the minute, I’d be mightily impressed with Dr. V’s miraculous skills. But really, this only makes me think that the producers grabbed Joe Gorga and his sister by the collar, told them to act nice or risk being written out next season. Even Teresa is replaceable, though I think the only true replacement for her might be a feral cat or a big-toothed extra from “Sharknado.”
It’s a shame Teresa felt it necessary to call Caroline for help, as by the time she arrived it was abundantly clear she served no purpose other than to sit and pontificate to no one. Kathie and Rich, on the other hand, offered a great deal of bad advice to everyone, while Rosie played the role of Rodney King, asking everyone over and over again to just get along.
Anyway, I guess we’re going to see a continuation of this therapeutic effort next week, though I’m not sure how long Joe Gorga and Teresa can hold it together. I can’t imagine Melissa is particularly thrilled to think her husband and his sister are close to ironing out their differences, simply because she knows Teresa will only behave herself for so long before she digs up another questionable claim about her. Maybe next season she can accuse Melissa of being a man, or a halfling, or maybe an evil sorceress who eats toads and baby fingers.
No matter how much Joe Gorga wants to make nice with Teresa, as long as Melissa is in the picture (and, given she’s Joe’s baby mama, I would hope that’s a long time), I can’t really see things working working out. Well, not unless there’s a paid vacation from Bravo involved.
What did you think of the brawl? Do you think Teresa and Joe Gorga will ever have a lasting truce?