Although they squashed their beef in last year’s finale, no one has suffered from the actions of the It’s Always Sunny In Philadelphia gang more than poor Rickety Cricket, as played by David Hornsby. Over the years, the former priest has had to poop in beds, smoke crack, wear lesions, and suck lemons, all because Frank decided to cash in on a water stain that looked like the Virgin Mary. Cricket’s been on the show 12 times — 13 if you count “The Gang Cracks the Liberty Bell,” which I’m not for the purpose of this post — and according to IMDB, he’ll continue to have his life ruined this season in the intriguingly-titled episode, “Psycho Pete Returns.”
But before that, let’s look at what the Gang has done to that poor bastard over the years.
“The Gang Exploits a Miracle”
“The Gang Gets Whacked: Part 2” (now living on the street, playing trashcan drums)
“The Gang Dances Their Asses Off”
“Mac and Dennis: Manhunters” (covered in what appears to be mustard stains)
“Who Pooped the Bed?” (at least he gets to poop in a real bed?)
“The Gang Wrestles for the Troops” (bleeding while dressed as the Talibum)
“Mac’s Big Break” (promising chicken, instead getting lemons)
“Dee Gives Birth”
“The Storm of the Century”
“The High School Reunion” (covered in ringworms)
“Pop-Pop: The Final Solution” (wannabe dog executioner)
“The Gang Squashes Their Beefs” (“beef squashed”)