There’s no shortage on Star Wars: Episode VII news these days, between casting rumors, Chewbacca’s behind-the-scenes photos (above) and JJ Abrams announcing that his script is finished so that Yoda might hear the figurative orgasms of millions of faithful fans. But one little nugget that slipped by almost unnoticed last week was the news that Carrie Fisher, Harrison Ford and Mark Hamill are all ready to report to work starting in March or April to reprise their iconic roles for the first time since a lot of us were in diapers.
It’s impossible to deny that Luke Skywalker, Han Solo and Princess Leia are three of the most important movie characters ever created, as you can check the cosplay out at any Comic-Con, Mega-Con, Super-Con and Conny-Con-Con for a reminder of just how special they and the rest of the characters in the Star Wars universe are to millions of people. But when it comes down to it, you’d also have a hard time arguing that Princess Leia’s different costumes don’t rule them all.
At 57, I’m positive (and hoping) that Fisher won’t be squeezing into the iconic gold bikini for Episode VII, but she doesn’t need to, because a Return of the Jedi DVD or Blu Ray is the gift that keeps on giving. It also really helps that pop culture and many female celebrities have relied so heavily on Princess Leia’s costumes to make people laugh and (far more likely) have grown men swoon over the 30 years since Fisher was first chained to Jaba the Hutt’s XXXXL royal futon.
We’re still more than a year away from the release of Star Wars: Episode VII, but we’re undoubtedly going to see more Princess Leia costumes than ever prior to that December 18, 2015 release date, so let’s take a little time to celebrate the many celebrities and TV shows that have honored Leia Organa Solo’s wardrobe over the years.
*This is not a ranking or a timeline. It’s just a celebration. But if you want to rank ‘em, have at it. In fact, I’ll even be sure to mention my favorite.
Jennifer Aniston on Friends
For every girl that shows up to Comic-Con or any “geek” or “nerd” event dressed as Slave Leia, we ultimately have Friends to thank. Obviously, we don’t have the costume at all without George Lucas’s brilliant mind in the first place, but had Rachel not worn the costume to fulfill Ross’s fantasy on the September 16, 1996 Friends episode, “The One with the Princess Leia” fantasy, I’m really not sure that the fad would have been as big as it has been over the last two decades.
Additionally, Aniston’s Leia costume combined both the white dress and the gold bikini, which is a great feat. However, I’m sure that there are purists out there who would complain that Slave Leia didn’t have the buns in her hair. Those people, though, have seriously missed the point.
Sophia Bush on MythBusters
The folks at MythBusters launched their 12th season on Jan. 4, 2014 with a “Star Wars Special” episode that featured Sophia Bush dressed as the more formal and appropriate version of Princess Leia. Still, if she had wanted to give the gold bikini a whirl, I’m not sure that anyone watching MythBusters would have complained. Kari Byron also dressed as Leia in the Endor jungle camo in this episode.
Tina Fey on 30 Rock
How much does Liz Lemon appreciate Princess Leia’s white formal dress? She not only uses it to help her escape from jury duty back in Chicago, but she also married Criss in it. In fact, it’s because of this classic 30 Rock wedding scene that I hope that Princess Leia ends up wearing the four-finger ring of a drug kingpin named Tito in Episode VII.
Olivia Munn
Going back to my hypothesis about Jennifer Aniston’s importance in the longevity of the Princess Leia slave costume, I also believe there’s a younger segment of society that may not have watched Friends (despite the fact that there are networks that play it 7,000 times per day) and these people probably attribute the dominance of this cosplay fad to the original hot geek-pandering female celebrity, Olivia Munn. She probably deserves plenty of credit, too, but I’m a #TeamRachelKarenGreen man.
Lois Griffin on Family Guy
Seth MacFarlane is a huge Star Wars fan, as I’m sure you could tell from not one but three Family Guy specials, and there’s no doubt that fans of the Fox cartoon series were ecstatic to see Lois Griffin running the gauntlet of Leia costumes over MacFarlane’s trilogy spoof.
(Image via Fox)
Kim Kardashian
Once upon a time, Kanye West made a TV pilot. It was… strange. At least what I’ve seen of it was really strange, and you can watch Kim Kardashian’s bizarre turn as Slave Leia here, if you’re a more patient human being than I am.
Kristen Bell on Fanboys
Given Kristen Bell’s standing in the “nerd/geek” community, I’d be willing to bet that there are a lot of guys out there who would rank her Slave Leia from Fanboys as their numero uno. I was also going to make a joke about how she wore the child’s version of this costume and then I remembered that on no planet should a child’s size of this costume exist.
Laura Prepon on That 70s Show
Laura Prepon’s ties to sci-fi aren’t just limited to the Church of Scientology, as she once wore Leia’s white dress as Donna on That 70’s Show as a gift for her boyfriend, Eric. Costumes aside, I never understood the relationship between Donna and Eric. She was way out of his league, but then maybe that’s how things worked in the 70s. Lower standards and everyone smelling slightly like weed.
Kym Johnson on Dancing with the Stars
Former boy band member and current Bosley Hair Resoration spokesman Joey Fatone finished second place on Season 4 of the American version of Dancing with the Stars with his partner Kym Johnson, but they deserved to win it all that season. Mostly, they deserved the top prize for their Week 3 dance alone that had Kym rocking the Slave Leia outfit while they performed a Tango to a Star Wars theme and Cantina Band mix. To put this performance into perspective, I’ve never watched an episode of Dancing with the Stars, but I’ve watched this particular dance clip three times.
Yvonne Strahovski on Chuck
At one point during Chuck’s five-season run on NBC, I wanted to write thousands of words about why Chuck was the most average-but-fun show on TV that nobody was watching. But then, I realized that nobody would have read that unless I just wrote “Yvonne Strahovski” a million times until my fingers curled up into useless balls of skin and bones. But like any good show that was about a “geek” living a double life, Strahovski’s Agent Sarah Walker wouldn’t have been doing her job if she didn’t show up to a party dressed as Slave Leia.
(Remember what I said about ranking all of the Leia costumes? This would be my No. 1. Yes, this is pure pandering for the sake of ratings, but if Yvonne Strahovski wanted to dress like Jaba the Hutt instead, I’d probably rank her as the No. 1 Jaba, too.)
(Image via NBC)
AnnaLynne McCord on 90210
I barely ever watched the original Beverly Hills 90210, so I never watched the updated version on The CW, but while I was compiling this list, I discovered that the very lovely AnnaLynne McCord had dressed as Slave Leia for an episode and I’d be a big, old jerk if I didn’t include her in the fun.
(Image via the CW)
The Deal or No Deal Models
NBC’s once-prominent game show Deal or No Deal was the perfect fit for a Star Wars-themed episode, because it allowed Howie Mandel to wear decorative gloves so he didn’t have to touch anyone, and it far more importantly let all of the models dress up as Slave Leia. The fact that NBC doesn’t have a treasury of pictures and videos from this one episode on its website still is proof enough of the network’s incompetence.
(Image via NBC)
Adrianne Curry
I don’t know what Adrianne Curry does for a living, but I know that she shows up to Comic-Con each year in sexy costumes that make all of the fanboys have to sit down for 20 minutes at a time. I’d argue that despite her best efforts – and she does a really great job – Curry still isn’t the sexiest woman showing off her cosplay in San Diego, but when it comes to Slave Leia, you have to admire her ability to really take on the role.
(Image via Getty)
Alessandra Torresani
I’m admittedly an ignorant n00b when it comes to the fascination with Battlestar Galactica, so I’m clearly not an expert on the spin-off prequel Caprica that only lasted one season on SyFy. And if I looked to this parody video to learn more about the show, I’d be screwed, but it does have Caprica’s Alessandra Torresani dressed as Slave Leia, so I’m now upset that her show didn’t get another chance.
Allie Haze in Star Wars XXX: A Porn Parody
There really weren’t many SFW options to put here, but even the porn industry has celebrated Leia’s many costumes (more than just in this porn parody, I’m sure). This adult film in particular, which starred Allie Haze as Leia, earned the actress significant acclaim from her peers, as she was nominated for Best Actress at the 2013 AVN Awards, and she won Best Actress honors at both the XBIZ and XCritic Fans Choice Awards shows. But obviously you already knew that.
(Image via Getty)
Melissa Joan Hart
I don’t know why Melissa Joan Hart dressed up as Slave Leia many years ago, but I don’t really care. All I know is that if this picture existed in poster form, 12-year old Burnsy would have had at least three of them up in his bedroom.
(Image via Getty)
Kelly Brook
British model Kelly Brook teamed up with Total Film to sex up some of cinema’s most iconic characters and costumes, which included her own take on a much more, um, supportive Slave Leia costume. She also showed off an Indiana Jones costume and it had me convinced that Kingdom of the Crystal Skull could have been way better with some different casting decisions.
Alyssa Milano
Years ago, when Charmed was still a thing on the WB, Alyssa Milano stopped by a Halloween episode of Ellen dressed as Princess Leia in the white dress. I think I speak for all men who grew up with insane crushes on Milano that IT SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE GOLD BIKINI, DAMN IT!
Arianny Celeste
Normally, I don’t complain about anything that UFC ring girl Arianny Celeste does. If she and her counterpart, Brittney Palmer, wanted to dress up as Klingons and recite lines from The Phantom Menace, I wouldn’t care. However, in this strange video, Celeste’s sexy Leia routine is sort of ruined by the fact that she’s dancing seductively for Darth Vader, who is her father. At least in Star Wars: A XXX Porn Parody, Allie Haze’s Princess Leia clearly states that she’s not related to Luke Skywalker before she… I mean, YOU WATCHED THE PORN.
Betty White
“Hey wait, when the f*ck did Betty White dress up as Princess Leia in the gold bikini?” Back in 2010, the Portland Mercury held a contest to let readers design the cover of an upcoming issue. Once the readers had their say, it was determined that they wanted to see Betty White as Slave Leia wielding a flaming chainsaw while riding a John Ritter centaur. The result, with artwork by artist Andrew Zubko, is one of the greatest pieces of art to ever be produced by man.
Several Characters From The Simpsons
Family Guy isn’t the only primetime cartoon that has shown its fondness of Star Wars in the past. Several characters from The Simpsons have been given the Princess Leia treatment, including Lisa, who got the Leia buns during a haircut montage, and Ralph Wiggum, who dressed as Leia for “Inspirational Women Day” and proudly declared, “I’m a Star Wars.”
There’s also this comic book version of Marge dressed as Slave Leia that I’m sure many grown men just right-clicked and saved for reasons of their own that we don’t need to discuss.
(Images via Fox)
Miss Piggy
Way back in 1980, the characters of Star Wars got their puppet on several times, as C3-PO and R2-D2 joined the gang on Sesame Street for two episodes. But the real fun was being had by the Muppets, as Mark Hamill, the droids and Chewbacca stopped by to spoof their huge film franchise. Naturally, because she has always been the most important female Muppet, Miss Piggy played the role of Princess Leia in this “Pigs in Space” sketch.
Kaley Cuoco
Leave it to Kaley Cuoco, the star of The Big Bang Theory, which panders to so-called nerds and geeks more than almost any show on television, to make this fake PSA that actually convinces women to dress as other sexy comic book, video game and movie characters for Halloween. At the very least, there should be a law that limits the number of Slave Leias allowed at one party at one time, but there shall be no limits on the number of Leia costumes at Comic-Con. That’s what the Constitution would look like in my America.