The Academy managed to figuratively punch me in the nuts three separate times last year — first when they snubbed Jake Gyllenhaal, again when they nominated Eddie Redmayne†, and again when Eddie Redmayne won. But enough about what those sh*t brained fossils think, anyone with taste could tell you that last year’s rightful best actor winner was Jake Gyllenhaal in Nightcrawler (my review), a weirdo performance and a weirdo movie for the ages. And soon you won’t have to take my word for it, because it’s coming to Netflix next month. June 10, to be exact.
Here’s what’s on tap for June, via EntertainmentWeekly:
Available June 1
The Aviator
La Dictadura PerfectaAvailable June 3
The Best of Me
Hector and the Search for HappinessAvailable June 5
Sense8Available June 8
Grace of MonacoAvailable June 9
It’s Tough Being Loved by JerksAvailable June 10
Pretty Little Liars, season 5
Nightcrawler
Rose WaterAvailable June 11
Marvel’s Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D., season 2Available June 12
Orange is the New Black, season 3
Champs
The CobblerAvailable June 13
Scandal, season 4Available June 15
Pussy Riot: A Punk Prayer
Rodney Carrington: Laughter’s Good
Danger Mouse, seasons 1-10
Bindi’s Bootcamp, season 1Available June 16
Lee Daniels’ The ButlerAvailable June 17
Point and ShootAvailable June 19
Some Assembly RequiredAvailable June 20
CakeAvailable June 23
AdvantageousAvailable June 24
Beyond the LightsAvailable June 26
Dreamworks Dragons: Race to the Edge
What Happened, Miss Simone?
If you need a little perspective, you could always check out Jennifer Aniston’s brave, brave performance in Cake on June 20, probably one of the 10 most insufferable movies I’ve ever sat through. Or as Pete Hammond calls it, “an Oscar-worthy performance.”
You may have also recognized The Cobbler, an at one point much-anticipated serious turn for Adam Sandler from director Tom McCarthy. It’s actually unclear whether this one was even released. Some sites reported that it made $24,000 in limited release, while others say it went straight to video. It’s nowhere to be found on BoxOfficeMojo. The AV Club tried to get to the bottom of the mystery and came up empty handed. Amongst the critics who did see it, it fared even worse than Blended (11 percent to 14 percent on RottenTomatoes, respectively). In any case, we can all see what the fuss wasn’t about come June 12.
Of course, as for me, I’ll be binge watching Bindi’s Bootcamp.
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I’m a true fan, I always watch with my wrist guards on.